# You know youve been bitten by the tortoise bug when...



## TommyZ (Sep 26, 2013)

Hi All, 

Just a topic I thought would be fun, every one can "fill in the blanks"....be creative!

You know youve been bitten by the tortoise bug when...

1) You now examine every odd object in your house to see if you can macguyver it into a usable tort tool...

2) Instead of borrowing a cup of sugar, you ask your neighbors to give you their veggie trimmings...

Lets see what ya all got!


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## mike taylor (Sep 26, 2013)

You stop on your way home to pick weeds and wild flowers for them to eat.

Sent from my C771 using TortForum mobile app


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## Elohi (Sep 26, 2013)

TommyZ said:


> You know youve been bitten by the tortoise bug when...



You start turning over rocks and debris in the woods, looking for Rollie Pollies. 



Elohi(Earth)[TURTLE]


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## pfara (Sep 26, 2013)

Fun thread! I'll bite..

1. You start *really* noticing people's yards to see if what they have is tort friendly then thinking about taking seeds to propagate in your own yard. (Yes.. I think in a past life I was a klepto)
2. You keep imagining what the master bedroom would look like with a foot+ deep of substrate. Then daydreaming about what plants you'd want and where it'd be placed. You know, after you rig the ceiling/roof to open and close at the push of a button.


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## parrotlady (Sep 26, 2013)

You just put in an offer to buy 1acre just for your tortoises!


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## BeeBee*BeeLeaves (Sep 26, 2013)

You walk, not one, but two big huge shaggy dogs ... you scope out all empty lots that you know are not being managed ... you look left ... you look right ... you take out your hori hori knife ... you stab the ground quickly ... you lift the plantain (or dandelion, or ??) ... you quickly put it in your bag ... you may do it again and again if there is a stand of weeds ... you can't help yourself ... and you act like you just picked up dog poop ... lots of it ... you are .... a guerilla weeder tortoise food taker.


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## NicoleB26 (Sep 26, 2013)

You join the tortoise forum because your boyfriend says "Can we please not talk about tortoises today?"

Sent from my Galaxy Nexus using TortForum mobile app


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## Sulcata_Sandy (Sep 26, 2013)

Nicole said:


> You join the tortoise forum because your boyfriend says "Can we please not talk about tortoises today?"
> 
> Sent from my Galaxy Nexus using TortForum mobile app



HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH


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## New Desert Tortoise Mommy (Sep 26, 2013)

When aalllll u talk about and plan is ur house and house it has to be perfect for the tortoises and not us haha and u cant have one conversation with out tortoises coming up

please and thank you


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## HelenP (Sep 26, 2013)

Nicole said:


> You join the tortoise forum because your boyfriend says "Can we please not talk about tortoises today?"
> 
> Sent from my Galaxy Nexus using TortForum mobile app



LOL I have had this line also and the rolling of the eyes lol


When you do a happy dance, while waving a bunch of Organic Dandelions you just found in the produce department of Albertsons lol


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## ShellyTurtlesCats (Sep 26, 2013)

You see this and add: Others see tortoise food.

_________
~ Shelly ~


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## pugsandkids (Sep 26, 2013)

Hahaha!


All hilarious and so true! 

When you have your whole family making sure torts are in for the night. (Cause if they are forgotten, all you know what's gonna break lose!)


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## Kathy Coles (Sep 26, 2013)

You're broke, can't afford to go to dinner, yet spend $172 for a tortoise heating pad (credit card of course) because he NEEDS it.


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## LisaTurtle (Sep 26, 2013)

Every garden & large planter you see you think to yourself "ooh that would make an awesome tort enclosure!"


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## BodaTort1 (Sep 27, 2013)

1. When you have a bad day at work and all you want to do is go home and be with your torties.

2. When you go to Lowes/Home Depot or garden center and you pick up Hibiscus flowers off the ground and stuff it in your purse.

3. When the last thing you do before you go to sleep and the first thing you do when you wake up is check Tortoise Forum for new threads!


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## OCTortoiseGuy (Sep 27, 2013)

When you look out your window at work and see Dandelion weeds that have gone to seed and you get up, go collect all the seeds and then go home and plant them in your yard.


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## SpdTrtl (Sep 27, 2013)

You spend more money upgrading an outdoor tortoise habitat than making updates to the inside of your own house.




BodaTort1 said:


> 2. When you go to Lowes/Home Depot or garden center and you pick up Hibiscus flowers off the ground and stuff it in your purse.



HAHAHAHA...I have totally done this!


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## sunshine_hugs (Sep 27, 2013)

When your friends and neighbours start referring to you as "The Crazy Tortoise Lady." 

When tattoo a tortoise onto your body! 





BodaTort1 said:


> 2. When you go to Lowes/Home Depot or garden center and you pick up Hibiscus flowers off the ground and stuff it in your purse.



Yep...been there!  My kids are embarrassed to go to a nursery with me!


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## Elohi (Sep 27, 2013)

Your replies are hilarious! I love this! 
I think my fb friends are about sick of seeing pictures of my boxie. I post as many pictures of her as I do my 3 kids. She's just so pretty!! At least here I can post a picture of her digging with her butt sticking up in the air, call it "cute" and people not think I'm insane. 


Elohi(Earth)[TURTLE]


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## N2TORTS (Sep 27, 2013)

You turn your entire back yard into one Giant tort table ......


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## ShellyTurtlesCats (Sep 27, 2013)

*Re: RE: You know youve been bitten by the tortoise bug when...*



Elohi said:


> Your replies are hilarious! I love this!
> I think my fb friends are about sick of seeing pictures of my boxie. I post as many pictures of her as I do my 3 kids. She's just so pretty!! At least here I can post a picture of her digging with her butt sticking up in the air, call it "cute" and people not think I'm insane.
> 
> 
> Elohi(Earth)[TURTLE]



I relate. I have an album just for my pets and I guarantee I've been blocked by a few by now!

_________
~ Shelly ~


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## AZtortMom (Sep 27, 2013)

Yup me too [FACE SAVOURING DELICIOUS FOOD]


Life is good


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## NicoleB26 (Sep 27, 2013)

These posts are hilarious! Literally laughing out loud. Does anyone else have a baby book for their torts?

Sent from my Galaxy Nexus using TortForum mobile app


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## erica anne (Sep 27, 2013)

When at the end of a stressful day all you want to do is sit outside with your tortoise.


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## AnnV (Sep 27, 2013)

You are rearranging and eliminating furniture in the family room to make room for your new custom made tort enclosures.

Ann from CT


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## sunshine_hugs (Sep 27, 2013)

Nicole said:


> These posts are hilarious! Literally laughing out loud. Does anyone else have a baby book for their torts?
> 
> Sent from my Galaxy Nexus using TortForum mobile app




Hahaha....me too. A baby book for your torts? That's my favourite one so far!


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## jjsull33 (Sep 27, 2013)

When you go from 2 torts to 7 torts in the course of a summer.


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## NicoleB26 (Sep 27, 2013)

*Re: RE: You know youve been bitten by the tortoise bug when...*



AnnV said:


> You are rearranging and eliminating furniture in the family room to make room for your new custom made tort enclosures.
> 
> Ann from CT



Too funny! I just got rid of a desk and took the leaf out if my dining room table to make room for the new enclosure I insisted we needed to build. Its so nice to see I am not the only one who does this silly stuff for the love of my torts. Lol

Sent from my Galaxy Nexus using TortForum mobile app


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## forujade00 (Sep 27, 2013)

When u knock on your neighbor's door and ask if you can weed their rose garden. Lol

Sent from my SCH-I545 using TortForum mobile app


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## kathyth (Sep 27, 2013)

When you read a post, titled " You know you have been bitten by the tortoise bug" and crack up at each posting, as you relate to everything!
I am guilty of all of the above.
J.D.'s reality is like a fantasy to some of us.


And I will add....... When you are stopping at various stores looking for cactus fruit.
When you suddenly see a use for all kinds of containers. Water bowls, substrate containers, soil containers, various food containers.
Rubbermaid tubs are calling you.
You dream about plexiglass.
You LOVE going to Home Depot to look at Bricks, pavers, shade cloth, wood, anything that can give ideas on spending more money on enclosures.


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## NicoleB26 (Sep 27, 2013)

forujade00 said:


> When u knock on your neighbor's door and ask if you can weed their rose garden. Lol
> 
> Sent from my SCH-I545 using TortForum mobile app



Too funny!!


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## TommyZ (Sep 27, 2013)

When on your bucket list of places to visit, you replace Monaco with JDs Tortoise Cove...


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## sunshine_hugs (Sep 27, 2013)

forujade00 said:


> When u knock on your neighbor's door and ask if you can weed their rose garden. Lol
> 
> Sent from my SCH-I545 using TortForum mobile app



I laughed so hard at this!! 

I seriously can't enough of these. They're all so relatable. Great thread TommyZ!!


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## TomAlicia (Sep 27, 2013)

When you check on your tortoises more than you check on your toddler and new born...  

When you get excited weeds are grown in your yard 

When you're away from home and you pull out your phone just to look at a picture of your torts because you miss them

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I747 using TortForum mobile app


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## Irish (Sep 27, 2013)

mike taylor said:


> You stop on your way home to pick weeds and wild flowers for them to eat.
> 
> Sent from my C771 using TortForum mobile app



And then you pick flowers and weeds to share with Them for both your dinners.


When you take your tort to work on Take Your Kids To Work Day.


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## morloch (Sep 27, 2013)

And you move in!! Ha ha! [SMILING FACE WITH OPEN MOUTH][SMILING FACE WITH SMILING EYES]


Oops,, I posted that in the wrong spot!! Sorry!


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## izzy2208 (Sep 27, 2013)

When you take your tortoise(s) for a walk more often than you take your dog.

one baby sulcata and one russian tortoise 
<3 Tortluvr<3


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## forujade00 (Sep 28, 2013)

*Re: RE: You know youve been bitten by the tortoise bug when...*



TomAlicia said:


> When you check on your tortoises more than you check on your toddler and new born...
> 
> When you get excited weeds are grown in your yard
> 
> ...



You guys are killing me. Lol

Sent from my SCH-I545 using TortForum mobile app


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## Carol S (Sep 28, 2013)

When riding in the car I see rocks in empty lots and I say to my husband "that rock would look great in the tortoise yard". 

My husband does the grocery shopping because I hate to, however, I will go to the grocery store to buy greens for my tortoises. 

When in the car I see different weeds and plants and think "that would be good food for my tortoises." 

When the neigbors bring me a bag of weeds from their yard and I get more excited than if they brought me a cake or pie. 

When I get more excited ordering tortoise supplies than buying something for myself.


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## tortoise007 (Sep 28, 2013)

When you spend $40 and half an afternoon installing a dripper system for your newly bought weeds.


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## TommyZ (Sep 28, 2013)

All good ones! Nice job everyone!

Sent from my SCH-I535 using TortForum mobile app


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## TortLaw (Sep 28, 2013)

When you know that you will have your own house built a few years down the road, and you're already planning the attic to be a finished attic, a whole room just for the torts, with skylights that open up to let the sunshine in every sunny day.


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## BeeBee*BeeLeaves (Sep 29, 2013)

Oh my. These are great. You are all sick. You need help. Like me. : )


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## pugsandkids (Sep 29, 2013)

TortLaw said:


> When you know that you will have your own house built a few years down the road, and you're already planning the attic to be a finished attic, a whole room just for the torts, with skylights that open up to let the sunshine in every sunny day.



Brilliant idea!


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## Sulcata_Sandy (Oct 6, 2013)

I'm really ill.....
I've had Basenjis (African Barkless Dogs) for 22 years, and now tortoises...and my tiny, single income, crappy vet tech salary has a meager grocery budget...and more is spent on high quality dog food, and arm loads of organic greens for the torts....then I spend what is leftover on a few tidbits for myself.
Wouldn't have it any other way. [GROWING HEART][GRINNING FACE WITH SMILING EYES][TURTLE]


Wait....I've got another...

When you sit down in your favorite chair with a blanket, a snugly dog, and a good book for an afternoon of quiet reading....the new book being "Health Care And Rehabilitation of Turtles and Tortoises", and commence reading it from cover to cover.

[GRINNING FACE WITH SMILING EYES]

Twice 

[SMILING FACE WITH SMILING EYES]


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## Saleama (Oct 6, 2013)

When you are sitting on the floor watching TV and you reach for your coffee and get the crap scared out of you by your Russian Tortoise who is free roaming the living room because it is a bit chilly and rainy out and you had to go find him in the pitch black and rain because you were worried about him.

Also, I have done everything everybody has said here!


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## Sulcata_Sandy (Oct 6, 2013)

LOL

That's my house today. Everyone is loose in the living room and exploring. I love it when they cross paths, check one another out, maybe exchange a few unpleasantries, then continue on. LOL


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## Sh3wulf (Oct 6, 2013)

You explain to every neighbour adjacent to you that spraying there lawn with pesticides is dangerous cause it could get into your dandelion friendly yard and poison the tortoise (of course your holding the tortoise for impact) and now the neighbors are bringing big juicy dandelions they are so proud to have grown. Lol.


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## TommyZ (Oct 6, 2013)

When you wake up on your birthday (today), walk right past the wrapped box on the table with my name on it. To go into the torts room to say goodmornin to the tort, lol


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## Sh3wulf (Oct 6, 2013)

TommyZ said:


> When you wake up on your birthday (today), walk right past the wrapped box on the table with my name on it. To go into the torts room to say goodmornin to the tort, lol



Happy birthday! Did the torts have gifts for you too? Lol


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## TommyZ (Oct 6, 2013)

*Re: RE: You know youve been bitten by the tortoise bug when...*



Sh3wulf said:


> TommyZ said:
> 
> 
> > When you wake up on your birthday (today), walk right past the wrapped box on the table with my name on it. To go into the torts room to say goodmornin to the tort, lol
> ...



Of course, tortellini greeted me at his chamber door like always with a big smile.  kinda funny how he knows im coming now, and will get up and mosey over to have a head pet, lol.


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## N2TORTS (Oct 6, 2013)

TommyZ said:


> When you wake up on your birthday (today), walk right past the wrapped box on the table with my name on it. To go into the torts room to say goodmornin to the tort, lol



you didnt tell me you lived with your mom! 


*GOT YA * 



HAPPY B~DAY!


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## TommyZ (Oct 6, 2013)

*Re: RE: You know youve been bitten by the tortoise bug when...*



N2TORTS said:


> TommyZ said:
> 
> 
> > When you wake up on your birthday (today), walk right past the wrapped box on the table with my name on it. To go into the torts room to say goodmornin to the tort, lol
> ...



ROFL, no way id of offed myself longgg ago. You ever met an over protective Italian Mama? LOL...


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## wellington (Oct 6, 2013)

When you'd rather stay home to watch your torts and come on TFO to see what all the other tort crazies are talking about


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## sissyofone (Oct 6, 2013)

*Re: RE: You know youve been bitten by the tortoise bug when...*



wellington said:


> When you'd rather stay home to watch your torts and come on TFO to see what all the other tort crazies are talking about



Thats exactly what my hubby says about me. I never ever have left them the torts home alone. I would so much rather be with them and here on TFO learning.


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## Sh3wulf (Oct 6, 2013)

Would love a vid of Tortellini coming to greet you.


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## Sulcata_Sandy (Oct 6, 2013)

wellington said:


> When you'd rather stay home to watch your torts and come on TFO to see what all the other tort crazies are talking about



I resemble that statement.


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## wellington (Oct 6, 2013)

sissyofone said:


> wellington said:
> 
> 
> > When you'd rather stay home to watch your torts and come on TFO to see what all the other tort crazies are talking about
> ...



Okay, you are taking it a little too far . You do need to cut the egg sack. and get out a little


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## Dafish (Oct 6, 2013)

Nicole said:


> You join the tortoise forum because your boyfriend says "Can we please not talk about tortoises today?"
> 
> Sent from my Galaxy Nexus using TortForum mobile app


hahahaha....
Nice one ...


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## tortbie (Oct 12, 2013)

...you miss your tortoise when you are at work


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## Moonlights (Oct 13, 2013)

When you find yourself outside on the neighbor's lawn cutting their weeds (me yesterday)


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## Sulcata_Sandy (Oct 13, 2013)

You spend an entire day driving across the state to pick up a rescue, and you are so excited to get a 50 lb "buddy".




-------
Sandy
Oregon-Washington Tortoise Rescue

Mo the Sulcata (4.8 lbs)
Oliver the Sulcata (50 lbs)
Larry the Jordanian Greek
Curly the Eastern Hermanni
....baby Sulcata Franklin on the way!
Lola the Basenji
Dexter the Basenji
John the boyfriend stuck in Kansas...so I get more tortoises!






-------
Sandy
Oregon-Washington Tortoise Rescue

Mo the Sulcata (4.8 lbs)
Oliver the Sulcata (50 lbs)
Larry the Jordanian Greek
Curly the Eastern Hermanni
....baby Sulcata Franklin on the way!
Lola the Basenji
Dexter the Basenji
John the boyfriend stuck in Kansas...so I get more tortoises!


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## Sh3wulf (Oct 13, 2013)

When you agree to a full day of loading dirt from the driveway into wheelbarrows and carrying them to the back of a friends house to help build NINE gardens, in trade for plants your tort can eat. My back is killing me!


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## Rocky08 (Oct 13, 2013)

When a teenager gets in trouble with parents, not for going out partying, but for spending too much on his torts and staying home to look after them.

Damn crazy kids...


1 Russian tortoise -Rocky
3 dogs (jealous of the attention)


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## Sulcata_Sandy (Oct 13, 2013)

When you think THIS is appropriate tortoise behavior.....






Ok, what do I win? 


-------
Sandy
Oregon-Washington Tortoise Rescue

Mo the Sulcata (4.8 lbs)
Oliver the Sulcata (50 lbs)
Larry the Jordanian Greek
Curly the Eastern Hermanni
....baby Sulcata Franklin on the way!
Lola the Basenji
Dexter the Basenji
John the boyfriend stuck in Kansas...so I get more tortoises!


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## shellbabymom (Oct 13, 2013)

When I get a tortoise tattooed on my forearm! 

Sent from my SCH-I535 using TortForum mobile app


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## Sulcata_Sandy (Oct 13, 2013)

shellbabymom said:


> When I get a tortoise tattooed on my forearm!
> 
> Sent from my SCH-I535 using TortForum mobile app



Awwww. I have tattooes......love them


-------
Sandy
Oregon-Washington Tortoise Rescue

Mo the Sulcata (4.8 lbs)
Oliver the Sulcata (50 lbs)
Larry the Jordanian Greek
Curly the Eastern Hermanni
....baby Sulcata Franklin on the way!
Lola the Basenji
Dexter the Basenji
John the boyfriend stuck in Kansas...so I get more tortoises!


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## LisaTurtle (Oct 13, 2013)

SenjiSandy said:


> When you think THIS is appropriate tortoise behavior.....
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Sandy you are crazy LOL!


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## Sh3wulf (Oct 14, 2013)

Your giving consideration to moving countries, so you can reside in a state where your tort will have a year-around outdoor enclosure.


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## Sulcata_Sandy (Oct 14, 2013)

Lisa says I'm crazy.....so we've met?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Yah, I definitely swing on a different rope. I used to be frustrated, but now I'm in my 40's and pretty comfortable in my own skin.



-------
Sandy
Oregon-Washington Tortoise Rescue

Mo the Sulcata (4.8 lbs)
Oliver the Sulcata (50 lbs)
Larry the Jordanian Greek
Curly the Eastern Hermanni
....baby Sulcata Franklin on the way!
Lola the Basenji
Dexter the Basenji
John the boyfriend stuck in Kansas...so I get more tortoises!


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## sueb4653 (Oct 14, 2013)

When half of your 1st floor is a tortoise enclosure.
When you go the zoo and pick their weeds instead of looking at the animals.
When you get tired of explaining the difference between a turtle and tortoise and saying I have tortoises NOT turtles -


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## luvpetz27 (Oct 14, 2013)

TommyZ said:


> When on your bucket list of places to visit, you replace Monaco with JDs Tortoise Cove...



SO FUNNY!!  
I LOVE IT!!!


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## StarSapphire22 (Oct 14, 2013)

*Re: RE: You know youve been bitten by the tortoise bug when...*



Nicole said:


> These posts are hilarious! Literally laughing out loud. Does anyone else have a baby book for their torts?



Not yet, but glad I saw this before my baby arrived! Totally doing this. 




Nicole said:


> You join the tortoise forum because your boyfriend says "Can we please not talk about tortoises today?"



I was getting that. Joined forum. Now I get "Can you puh-leeeeeease stop tortoise-ing and come spend time with ME?" Silly men. 

I guess I've been bit by the bug. "Tortoise-ing" is a verb in our household. XD


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## LisaTurtle (Oct 15, 2013)

StarSapphire22 said:


> Nicole said:
> 
> 
> > These posts are hilarious! Literally laughing out loud. Does anyone else have a baby book for their torts?
> ...



LOL same here but my husband calls it "turtle-ing" !!


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## mtdavis254817 (Oct 18, 2013)

When your wife ask you what you want for Christmas and say humidifiers


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## AZtortMom (Oct 18, 2013)

mtdavis254817 said:


> When your wife ask you what you want for Christmas and say humidifiers



LOL!


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## Sulcata_Sandy (Oct 18, 2013)

You get a bonus from your boss, and you blow it on tortoises


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## JennBell0725 (Oct 18, 2013)

Your running AC everywhere in the house but have a heater in Their Room. Oh yeah and they have a room.


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## AnnV (Oct 18, 2013)

*Re: RE: You know youve been bitten by the tortoise bug when...*



JennBell0725 said:


> Your running AC everywhere in the house but have a heater in Their Room. Oh yeah and they have a room.



Hahaa! Good one!


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## keepergale (Oct 18, 2013)

When you use your smart phone more than a teenager because you just got the Tortoise Forum App.


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## AZtortMom (Oct 19, 2013)

keepergale said:


> When you use your smart phone more than a teenager because you just got the Tortoise Forum App.



Amen!


Or their room feels like your walking into a sauna [FLUSHED FACE][TURTLE]


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## BatTort (Oct 19, 2013)

...when you care more about getting your torts lights off by his bed time than you do getting yourself to sleep after along day at work.


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## wellington (Oct 19, 2013)

When your tortoises shed is warmer then your own house


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## AZtortMom (Oct 20, 2013)

Your torts eat better then you [FACE SAVOURING DELICIOUS FOOD]


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## Rocky08 (Oct 20, 2013)

When you have the tort version of a baby monitor in the bedroom


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## AZtortMom (Oct 20, 2013)

Rocky08 said:


> When you have the tort version of a baby monitor in the bedroom



Ok, I want one! [SMILING FACE WITH OPEN MOUTH]


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## Rocky08 (Oct 20, 2013)

Chainsawkitten said:


> Rocky08 said:
> 
> 
> > When you have the tort version of a baby monitor in the bedroom
> ...



The best part is it can have 4 transmitters in different parts of the enclosure or multiple enclosures on different channels 
Just press a button to switch 
$49 on amazon, best buy ever


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## AZtortMom (Oct 20, 2013)

Rocky08 said:


> Chainsawkitten said:
> 
> 
> > Rocky08 said:
> ...



Nice!


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## Sh3wulf (Oct 21, 2013)

Rocky08 said:


> When you have the tort version of a baby monitor in the bedroom



That's wild! And dedicated lol. Does it have an alarm if something changes drastically? I tried finding on Amazon but had no luck


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## Rocky08 (Oct 21, 2013)

Sh3wulf said:


> Rocky08 said:
> 
> 
> > When you have the tort version of a baby monitor in the bedroom
> ...



No alarm, it's meant to show temps outside and display them inside your house 
Thanks haha, Yeah I got it a couple years ago


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## kathyth (Oct 21, 2013)

You read everyone of these posts, laugh and totally relate!
This is the best thread!


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## hippohugger13 (Oct 21, 2013)

When you are preparing for a new tort and you and your boyfriend refer to him by starting sentences with "when the new baby gets here"


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## Saleama (Oct 21, 2013)

SenjiSandy said:


> You get a bonus from your boss, and you blow it on tortoises



LOL.... My contract changed hands last month so I am getting 2 weeks of vacation paid out tomorrow. I adopted five tiny baby box turtles this weekend and my Russians learned how to get out of their garden. Take a wild guess on what I am going to spend that money on? And it is NOT a PS4 or Xbox 1.


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## AZtortMom (Oct 21, 2013)

kathyth said:


> You read everyone of these posts, laugh and totally relate!
> This is the best thread!



That's me!


You go to Home Depot/Loews and your regular guy says "how are your torts?"


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## StarSapphire22 (Oct 23, 2013)

When you "plate" your torts breakfast.

Today's special? Oh, why, it's spring mix on a bed of dandelion, topped with a sprinkling of cucumber along with a side of pumpkin and a pansy garnish.


And when your shopping list includes a bathmat so he stops slipping in the soak bin.


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## AZtortMom (Oct 23, 2013)

When you go to a restaurant and you get a salad and the first that pops in your head "OO tort food!"


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## TommyZ (Oct 23, 2013)

When your excuse for adding more torts, is because 1 doesnt eat the fresh food fast enough and you throw it out.


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## AZtortMom (Oct 23, 2013)

TommyZ said:


> When your excuse for adding more torts, is because 1 doesnt eat the fresh food fast enough and you throw it out.



LOL that's awesome! I will remember that one [SMILING FACE WITH OPEN MOUTH]


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## Kirin (Oct 23, 2013)

When you go to the store and buy a dog bed but not for your dog and he LOVES IT! 



Sleeps on it every night.


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## Cute_Obi (Oct 24, 2013)

When you have a framed photo of your baby tort at your work cubicle.
and
When you sit in front of your tortoise's enclosure and baby talk to him and suddenly your sister show's up and says, "Eww is that what you do all day", and your answer is "Yeah!".


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## AZtortMom (Oct 24, 2013)

Cute_Obi said:


> When you have a framed photo of your baby tort at your work cubicle.
> and
> When you sit in front of your tortoise's enclosure and baby talk to him and suddenly your sister show's up and says, "Eww is that what you do all day", and your answer is "Yeah!".



Dam straight


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## Jabuticaba (Oct 24, 2013)

...you make polymer/FIMO torts because you don't have room for the 10 different species of torts you wish you could have. [GRINNING FACE WITH SMILING EYES]


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## whisper (Oct 25, 2013)

When you leave a long random shoot of hibiscus alone when trimming bushes just because there is a flower bud on it.


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## mtdavis254817 (Oct 26, 2013)

When you rejoice over your tort's bowel movements and even some times you take pictures


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## Jabuticaba (Oct 26, 2013)

mtdavis254817 said:


> When you rejoice over your tort's bowel movements and even some times you take pictures



Don't tell me there's a poop thread and I've totally missed it!


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## Timjb97 (Oct 27, 2013)

sueb4653 said:


> When half of your 1st floor is a tortoise enclosure.
> When you go the zoo and pick their weeds instead of looking at the animals.
> When you get tired of explaining the difference between a turtle and tortoise and saying I have tortoises NOT turtles -



Forever telling people what the differences are and that I'm getting a tortoise, not a turtle!!


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## AZtortMom (Oct 27, 2013)

Timjb97 said:


> sueb4653 said:
> 
> 
> > When half of your 1st floor is a tortoise enclosure.
> ...



Yuppers! I think that conversation will always be had!


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## Cowboy_Ken (Oct 27, 2013)

I usually explain it this way, â€œEvery tortoise is a turtle, but not every turtle is a tortoise".


When you film on your phone your tortoises breeding and the first thing friends ask when arriving a your place is, â€œReally, how much tortoise porn do you have on your phone? "


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## mtdavis254817 (Oct 27, 2013)

Lol ... Lots


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## TommyZ (Oct 29, 2013)

Bestest thread EVAR  Keep it up!


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## Sh3wulf (Oct 29, 2013)

When your involved in a three car high speed collision and your friends send you this card:

and the bouquet:


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## AZtortMom (Oct 29, 2013)

Sh3wulf said:


> When your involved in a three car high speed collision and your friends send you this card:
> and the bouquet:



that would so be my friends [SMILING FACE WITH HEART-SHAPED EYES][TURTLE]


When you are sitting in your living room at least once a day, with at least one tort soaking in some type of bin or bowl


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## Sulcata_Sandy (Oct 29, 2013)

Sh3wulf said:


> When your involved in a three car high speed collision and your friends send you this card:
> and the bouquet:



I just laughed my *** off


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## BeeBee*BeeLeaves (Oct 29, 2013)

Sh3wulf said:


> When your involved in a three car high speed collision and your friends send you this card:
> and the bouquet:



Oh.My.God. I am so glad you are okay. You are okay right? And your friends are right on. Those beautiful flowers may have chemicals added to stay beautiful from Chile to US/us. So, totally, do not feed to tortoises. But LOL, funny note. Yep, you are known for your love of tortoises alright. Three car high speed crash ... your tortoises are lucky you are still here! Dang. Yay! : )


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## N2TORTS (Oct 29, 2013)

Your the only Whetto in line at the Mexi Mart...El' Supra! ...with two cases of lettuce every other week for a couple of years now .....I know with the look they give me they are wondering what the heck I do with the stuff?.....


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## AZtortMom (Oct 29, 2013)

N2TORTS said:


> Your the only Whetto in line at the Mexi Mart...El' Supra! ...with two cases of lettuce every other week for a couple of years now .....I know with the look they give me they are wondering what the heck I do with the stuff?.....



I'm right there with ya! We call them food city here in Phoenix [GRINNING FACE WITH SMILING EYES][GRINNING FACE WITH SMILING EYES]


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## mtdavis254817 (Oct 29, 2013)

*Re: RE: You know youve been bitten by the tortoise bug when...*



AZtortMom said:


> N2TORTS said:
> 
> 
> > Your the only Whetto in line at the Mexi Mart...El' Supra! ...with two cases of lettuce every other week for a couple of years now .....I know with the look they give me they are wondering what the heck I do with the stuff?.....
> ...



Lol I know. I get fresh cactus pads at the Spanish market. When I walk in they all stop talking and look at me like I'm about to ask for directions or pull out a badge... Its worse in Mississippi than it was Texas


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## AZtortMom (Oct 29, 2013)

mtdavis254817 said:


> AZtortMom said:
> 
> 
> > N2TORTS said:
> ...



You should see looks I get. You would think they never saw a tall white redhead [FLUSHED FACE] let alone carrying a bunch of lettuce [FACE WITH STUCK-OUT TONGUE AND TIGHTLY-CLOSED EYES]


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## T33's Torts (Oct 29, 2013)

When you steal seed from various plants from a park..
Or when you find yourself imagining what your torts would sound like if they were to talk...

Okay okay.. I know I'm weird 


One time I asked a neighbor (older, asian lady, I'm not sure if she can speak English..) if I could take some of the dandelions in her front yard and she turned back into het house and ran away screaming...


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## ckidd_1999 (Oct 29, 2013)

When all you do during class is think about how to make a super awesome outdoor enclosure for a tortoise you don't even have yet  haha. I get in trouble for daydreaming a lot


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## Cowboy_Ken (Oct 29, 2013)

I've learn the proper way to prepare cactus pads from my niece for breakfast. When I go to the Mexican markets, with my beat to hell straw hat, they ask me if I'm from Texas, (I'm in Oregon) I laugh and tell them no, half my family is Mexican. If you knew how pale and scared of the sun I am, this would be real. Ask Sandy. She'll tell you.


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## Sulcata_Sandy (Oct 30, 2013)

Haha.....my family is from Scotland (where, ironically, "Sandy" is a boys name), and he be paler than I! [GRINNING FACE WITH SMILING EYES]

I've had countless people stop me in the grocery store and ask me how to prepare cactus pads. 
"I dunno, they are for my tortoises.". 

Typical shopping cart items for me...
Several heads of random greens and collards
3-4 cactus pads
A bag of soup bones (for the dogs)
Beer

I get teased a lot


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## AZtortMom (Oct 30, 2013)

tffnytorts said:


> When you steal seed from various plants from a park..
> Or when you find yourself imagining what your torts would sound like if they were to talk...
> 
> Okay okay.. I know I'm weird
> ...





I think my torts have English accents [GRINNING FACE WITH SMILING EYES][GRINNING FACE WITH SMILING EYES]


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## T33's Torts (Oct 30, 2013)

I think of mine with more of a russian accent..


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## AZtortMom (Oct 30, 2013)

tffnytorts said:


> I think of mine with more of a russian accent..



From Russia with love [FACE SAVOURING DELICIOUS FOOD]


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## mtdavis254817 (Oct 30, 2013)

Remember rock eater from the never ending story... That's what I picture the Aldabra sounding like... The sulcatas would click. And the ebts have a deep southern draw


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## TommyZ (Oct 30, 2013)

*Re: RE: You know youve been bitten by the tortoise bug when...*



AZtortMom said:


> tffnytorts said:
> 
> 
> > I think of mine with more of a russian accent..
> ...



My wife talks to our hatchling in Russian. Funny, we have a cherry head, and the word in Russian for tortoise is pronounced "cherry-pash-kee", so, all torts are now "cherries" lol


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## T33's Torts (Oct 30, 2013)

:heart: 
That's so darn cute!!


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## AnnV (Oct 30, 2013)

*Re: RE: You know youve been bitten by the tortoise bug when...*



Sh3wulf said:


> When your involved in a three car high speed collision and your friends send you this card:
> and the bouquet:



That is too much!!!! You win! ROFLMAO!


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## LisaTurtle (Oct 30, 2013)

My russian tort has a Spanish accent  My daughter is learning Spanish so I always make the tort "talk" to her in Spanish. She recently taught me the word 'tortuga' and now that's my new favorite word. I don't say turtle or tortoise anymore, everything is tortuga  I'm pretty sure my daughter regrets teaching me that!!


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## wellington (Oct 30, 2013)

When you think your tortoise talks and with an accent.. you guys are nuts, totally nuts


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## T33's Torts (Oct 30, 2013)

Aww c'mon! You're as nuts as we are!!


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## wellington (Oct 30, 2013)

tffnytorts said:


> Aww c'mon! You're as nuts as we are!!



Haha, probably


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## Cowboy_Ken (Oct 30, 2013)

Probably? Or was that spell check fixing probable?


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## AZtortMom (Oct 31, 2013)

tffnytorts said:


> Aww c'mon! You're as nuts as we are!!



Absolutely [FACE SAVOURING DELICIOUS FOOD]


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## mtdavis254817 (Oct 31, 2013)

The Latino store I get tortoise food and awkward stares


Mmmmm


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## AZtortMom (Nov 1, 2013)

You wait a half hour in front of your favorite tort supply place to open [FLUSHED FACE][FLUSHED FACE]


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## T33's Torts (Nov 1, 2013)

Omg I do that so often its unhealthy.


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## Jabuticaba (Nov 2, 2013)

Sh3wulf said:


> When your involved in a three car high speed collision and your friends send you this card:
> and the bouquet:



First, I'm sorry you got hit and I'm glad you're OK. Second, ROFL! That's priceless!


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## Sh3wulf (Nov 2, 2013)

If I didn't have a good sense of humour about it I wouldn't have a card telling me that lmao. I was very lucky to have walked away I'm told. I am grateful for that and plan to keep being grateful


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## AZtortMom (Nov 2, 2013)

All the games on your phone are tort/ turtle based [SMILING FACE WITH OPEN MOUTH]


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## Sh3wulf (Nov 2, 2013)

You see a post that says there are tort related games and immediately proceed to the App Store to download them.


AZtortMom said:


> All the games on your phone are tort/ turtle based [SMILING FACE WITH OPEN MOUTH]


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## AZtortMom (Nov 2, 2013)

Sh3wulf said:


> You see a post that says there are tort related games and immediately proceed to the App Store to download them.
> 
> 
> AZtortMom said:
> ...



They are called Shellrazer and turtles, huh? LOL


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## kjr153 (Nov 2, 2013)

When you tell your Realtor any possible houses have to have a huge back yard. Half for the kids and half for the tortoise.


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## mtdavis254817 (Nov 2, 2013)

When the size of the yard decides which house you buy


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## AZtortMom (Nov 2, 2013)

mtdavis254817 said:


> When the size of the yard decides which house you buy



When you don't care your neighbors call you Tortuga  because of the neighborhood you live in


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## AZtortMom (Nov 2, 2013)

When your traveling campion is a stuffed tort


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