# LGBTQ Members?



## Abdulla6169 (Jun 24, 2015)

Hey guys! I came out to all of you recently, but I was wondering if there are any Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans, or Queer (or Questioning) members on the forum.... I know there are a few members here that part of the LGBTQ community, but I was just wondering because maybe we could chat. Anyways, thanks for being such a great and wonderful community. 


P.S. I don't think this violates our forum's guidelines.


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## dmmj (Jun 24, 2015)

No it does not


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## Abdulla6169 (Jun 24, 2015)

dmmj said:


> No it does not


Oh Thanks


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## wellington (Jun 24, 2015)

AbdullaAli said:


> I know this thread exists, but the thread was shut down, and it was posted a while ago.... I also wanted to see members that are active right now.... Sorry if it's annoying or anything....



You have nothing to be sorry about, it's/you are not annoying. I think it's great that you found this forum to be a safe place for you to be you.


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## Tom (Jun 24, 2015)

AbdullaAli said:


> Sorry if it's annoying or anything....



With all due respect to all forum members, I don't think this is the place to discuss matters such as this. We have many younger members and TFO is not the place for them to be learning about such things.

For the record, I am not anti-gay. I am also not anti-straigt. I am anti-discussing-adult-matters in full view of children.

I ask that this sort of thing, regardless of orientation, be taken to private conversations, or to email, or to adult websites that are more appropriate for this sort of discussion.


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## Abdulla6169 (Jun 24, 2015)

Tom said:


> With all due respect to all forum members, I don't think this is the place to discuss matters such as this. We have many younger members and TFO is not the place for them to be learning about such things.
> 
> For the record, I am not anti-gay. I am also not anti-straigt. I am anti-discussing-adult-matters in full view of children.
> 
> I ask that this sort of thing, regardless of orientation, be taken to private conversations, or to email, or to adult websites that are more appropriate for this sort of discussion.


I respect your opinion, but I just don't understand why sexual orientation is an "adult matter".... That doesn't really matter right now, since it doesn't really violate forum rules.... I was just asking about LGBTQ members and I'll PM them anything I want to discuss with them... Thanks for sharing your opinion and thanks again for being such a valuable member.


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## Abdulla6169 (Jun 24, 2015)

AbdullaAli said:


> I respect your opinion, but I just don't understand why sexual orientation is an "adult matter".... That doesn't really matter right now, since it doesn't really violate forum rules.... I was just asking about LGBTQ members and I'll PM them anything I want to discuss with them... Thanks for sharing your opinion and thanks again for being such a valuable member.


Note: I don't mind if this thread goes a little out of topic.... I just don't want it to be a "being gay is wrong" sort of debate.


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## Yvonne G (Jun 24, 2015)

I think Tom said it on the other thread - I don't go around expressing my heterosexuality, so why should the LGBTQ community feel they have to express theirs?

In my opinion, if anyone wishes to know another members sexuality he can ask that other members contact him through PM. I'm for closing this thread and letting it drop.


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## Abdulla6169 (Jun 24, 2015)

Yvonne G said:


> I think Tom said it on the other thread - I don't go around expressing my heterosexuality, so why should the LGBTQ community feel they have to express theirs?
> 
> In my opinion, if anyone wishes to know another members sexuality he can ask that other members contact him through PM. I'm for closing this thread and letting it drop.


Yvonne, it's just hard being the minority in a really homophobic and hateful environment... I can't go around asking members about their sexuality via PM.... And I thought maybe I could ask around and find some more people who are just like me, and then PM them... It's hard to explain it to you guys, but sometimes living where society thinks you're sick and wrong makes you want to be with people who are like you....

Edit- Also, if we drop this thread and ask people to PM me, won't this thread receive less attention? So wouldn't it be more efficient to leave the thread on?


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## leigti (Jun 24, 2015)

AbdullaAli said:


> Yvonne, it's just hard being the minority in a really homophobic and hateful environment... I can't go around asking members about their sexuality via PM.... And I thought maybe I could ask around and find some more people who are just like me, and then PM them... It's hard to explain it to you guys, but sometimes living where society thinks you're sick and wrong makes you want to be with people who are like you....


I understand why you would be interested to find other people "like you. I did a thread a while back asking if there were any blind members and I did hear from a couple of them. They pm'd me. And I do understand that saying I am blind is not, I hope , a controversial or personal topic. I looked at it more like "is there anybody from Washington state out there?". But sexual orientation, along with other topics like religion and politics, will inevitably lead to debates and controversy. Starting a religion or politics thread wouldn't be right either in my opinion. I hope I am not sounding insulting by saying this cause it is not my intention. 
Moderators, would it be appropriate to leave the thread but put a statement on it to p.m. the person. And then lock it like you do for sale threads. That way it is private for all concerned. Just an idea.


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## leigti (Jun 24, 2015)

You know it's a difficult topic when you are trulybe supportive and you still come off sounding a little like a jerk. Sorry. Feel free to PM me and tell me off if you want to


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## dmmj (Jun 24, 2015)

I think the best way to go about it is beyond saying hi my name is so and so and I am X the conversation should go private qfter that.just my thoughts.


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## Abdulla6169 (Jun 24, 2015)

dmmj said:


> I think the best way to go about it is beyond saying hi my name is so and so and I am X the conversation should go private qfter that.just my thoughts.


I think that's a great idea....


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## jaizei (Jun 24, 2015)

Yvonne G said:


> I think Tom said it on the other thread - I don't go around expressing my heterosexuality, so why should the LGBTQ community feel they have to express theirs?




Except you do. You've spoken about your late husband, children, grandchildren. So has Tom. I doubt you thought twice about it. 

I don't think anyone was planning on being graphic or explicit so I don't see how it would be inappropriate.


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## JoesMum (Jun 24, 2015)

jaizei said:


> Except you do. You've spoken about your late husband, children, grandchildren. So has Tom. I doubt you thought twice about it.
> 
> I don't think anyone was planning on being graphic or explicit so I don't see how it would be inappropriate.


You can have all those without being heterosexual.


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## Abdulla6169 (Jun 24, 2015)

jaizei said:


> Except you do. You've spoken about your late husband, children, grandchildren. So has Tom. I doubt you thought twice about it.
> 
> I don't think anyone was planning on being graphic or explicit so I don't see how it would be inappropriate.



I don't think there's anything inappropriate with saying: "I am attracted to this gender."...

Also, why wouldn't children be able to look at this thread? I think a child who is able to browse the forum, properly take care of a tortoise, and can use the forum properly is smart enough to understand that not everyone is attracted to the opposite gender. There isn't anything dirty, wrong, or inappropriate about it.

That's just my opinion..... I'm not trying to offend anyone.

Edit- for example, in the Netherlands, children are taught about sexual orientation and contraceptives at age 11.... I don't children are a problem for this thread....


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## Elohi (Jun 24, 2015)

Us heterosexuals take what we express, do, say, and insinuate for granted and express these things without thinking twice. 

I honestly feel closing this thread is censoring and exactly why someone of the LGBTQ community feel like they stand on the outskirts.


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## Tidgy's Dad (Jun 24, 2015)

Personally, i think it's great to be able to post here and that hopefully other members will see it and go to PM with Abdulla, or others.
Maybe they won't all want to discuss it on a public thread like this, anyway.
There should be no debate here, just a place for people to post that they are a part of this community, if they want , or take it privately to PM, or just ignore it.


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## dmmj (Jun 24, 2015)

Here is the problem as I see it. In these type of discussions people take sides pro or con. Then they start saying why they feel this way,then the insults start. It has happened before which is why certain topics were banished


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## Yvonne G (Jun 24, 2015)

Tidgy's Dad said:


> Personally, i think it's great to be able to post here and that hopefully other members will see it and go to PM with Abdulla, or others.
> Maybe they won't all want to discuss it on a public thread like this, anyway.
> There should be no debate here, just a place for people to post that they are a part of this community, if they want , or take it privately to PM, or just ignore it.



I totally agree with this, and that's what I meant in my post. Ab has professed an interest in knowing other lgt or whatever members, and now they can PM him. But this thread has people talking about whether the thread is right or wrong, or if lgbtq people are accepted or not, and talking all around the original intent of the thread. In my opinion, if we, myself included, are not an lgbtq person, we should NOT have responded to the thread. The same way if I don't know how to care for a certain type of turtle or tortoise I should not respond to the thread.


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## leigti (Jun 24, 2015)

I will speak on any thread I want to. Otherwise it's not a real forum. When I saw it suggested that the thread to be taken down I disagreed. And stated my opinion. I offered a suggestion, take it or leave it but it's there. People are free to agree or disagree with anything I say. Maybe my use of the word "wrong" was not adequate but it's what I wrote. Would my suggestion work? With somebody's else suggestion work? Is there a happy medium here, I think there is. If people are allowed to only speak or participate in something that they have absolute first hand experience and then this would be a pretty quiet forum.


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## DawnH (Jun 24, 2015)

The problem is when we do something (censor this type of discussion) we are pretty much reducing all LGBT people down to the fact that it is all about what goes on in the bedroom. That is all that is discussed, right? That is what we are worried about, right? Never mind that it is about far greater things than plumbing and gymnastics.


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## leigti (Jun 24, 2015)

I think taking the thread down would be censoring. And it seems like most of the discussion has been on whether this thread is appropriate for this forum. I don't see any debates on personal feelings about A person's sexual orientation. Those are different topics completely.


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## tortdad (Jun 24, 2015)

AbdullaAli said:


> Hey guys! I came out to all of you recently, but I was wondering if there are any Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans, or Queer (or Questioning) members on the forum.... I know there are a few members here that part of the LGBTQ community, but I was just wondering because maybe we could chat. Anyways, thanks for being such a great and wonderful community.
> 
> 
> P.S. I don't think this violates our forum's guidelines.




I'm not a member but that doesn't mean you can't PM me to talk about it. I hadn't heard the news, just want you to know it doesn't change my opinion of you or anyone else.


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## Abdulla6169 (Jun 25, 2015)

tortdad said:


> I'm not a member but that doesn't mean you can't PM me to talk about it. I hadn't heard the news, just want you to know it doesn't change my opinion of you or anyone else.


Thanks a lot. This means so much.... If I ever need any help I'll PM you friend.


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## dmmj (Jun 25, 2015)

For those sayimg censorship,this is a private forum we all agreed to certain rules when we joined


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## taza (Jun 25, 2015)

Abdulla you can chat with me anytime.


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## Abdulla6169 (Jun 25, 2015)

taza said:


> Abdulla you can chat with me anytime.


Just thanks so much... I'll chat with you when I need help. You're a great friend


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## wellington (Jun 25, 2015)

I'm not getting the big deal. If a rule is broken on this or any other particular gay/lesbian thread or any thread at all, then that post is deleted and maybe a warning is given out. Get your minds out of thinking they only want to talk sex. Because of a lot of shallow minded people in the world, that's the first thing anyone thinks of. Because of these same shallow people, there still isn't real exceptance and the reason some gay and lesbians need each other for understanding and exceptance . When other members started a, oh let's say a "calling all Arizona member" thread, did anyone have a problem with it or think, "oh no, can't do that, they are only going to talk sex, this is a family pg forum, can't have kids see this"?
I think you should start your thread, new from this, seeing it turned into a discussion thread and follow the rules. If you need to get more personal then allowed, then please take it to a private convo, which I'm sure anyone would anyway.


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