The pain is unbearable. Goodbye Uno.

lovelytanyao

New Member
Joined
Aug 23, 2022
Messages
2
Location (City and/or State)
Qatar
Uno, my tortoise died yesterday. He is with us for 3 months only but losing him is really unbearable. He is the one who helped me cope with my anxiety and depression. He makes me happy every single day. I cannot even go to the living room where he used to roam around and eat. I can imagine how he gets my attention whenever he is hungry. I missed calling him “Uno” and he is right in front of me after a few minutes. I have a lot of "what ifs" within me. I couldn't stop crying remembering how he looks at me every time he wants to eat or wants to play outside. I can see him every time I close my eyes. It keeps flashing to my head over and over again the moment I see him upside down in very hot weather. If only I check on him earlier. If only I didn’t allow him to go outside. If only I didn’t close the door. If only I was knowledgeable enough to know that he could possibly turn upside down, I could have avoided it. I don’t know what to feel or how to move on from this. My friends are telling me just to get another tortoise (even Uno's veterinarian is saying the same thing), but how can they say that? Do they even know how I feel right now? I may sound overacting, but it pains me to think how uno suffered and tried to call me for help. I don’t know how to move on from this.
 

KarenSoCal

Well-Known Member
Tortoise Club
5 Year Member
Platinum Tortoise Club
Joined
Jul 8, 2017
Messages
5,557
Location (City and/or State)
Low desert 50 mi SE of Palm Springs CA
Oh, no! I am so saddened to hear about your beloved Uno! Those of us that have lost a tortoise understand completely the agony that you are suffering. It's horrible, and all you can really do is cry and let the pain lessen as time goes by.

Your description of Uno is so full of love! If you are able, I'd like to know more about him, like his species and age, and maybe even a picture of him. If it hurts too much, that's OK. He was certainly a wonderful tortoise.

There's no hurry for you to decide about another tortoise. Take the time you need, and when you're ready, make that choice. In the meantime, read everything here on the forum about Uno and his species. We have up to date care sheets and lots of info on every detail of tortoise keeping.

And welcome to the forum! I'm so sorry that it was such a sad event that brought you here...but we're glad you are here now.
 

MPRC

Well-Known Member
5 Year Member
Joined
Jun 24, 2015
Messages
3,099
Location (City and/or State)
Oregon
I am so sorry for your loss. Accidents happen and losing a pet is never easy.
I think when you are ready for another tortoise it will not be a disservice to Uno's memory to open your heart and home again. Keep an eye out for a tortoise or turtle who needs you and you never know what may turn up.
We lost a tortoise recently and planted a hibiscus tree on top of him so he's still "in" the tortoise yard as part of the creep.
 

wellington

Well-Known Member
Moderator
10 Year Member!
Tortoise Club
Joined
Sep 6, 2011
Messages
44,322
Location (City and/or State)
Chicago, Illinois, USA
So sorry for your loss. The feelings you are putting on your tortoise was not there. They can't call for help. They don't come when called.
Your sad feelings you are feeling about losing him, those are real and understandable. If and when you want to get another tortoise, please read as much info from this forum as possible. Roaming the floor is very dangerous for a tortoise and eventually that likely would have hurt him if not killed him.
They need a proper indoor and outdoor enclosure, proper heat, humidity, uvb, diet, hydration and space and that's what makes them happy and healthy.
Take the time you need to come to terms with the loss, not what others say.
Then come back on here if you have questions about making the proper enclosures.
 

Pebbles Roberts

Member
Platinum Tortoise Club
Joined
Jan 14, 2022
Messages
35
Location (City and/or State)
Beckenham, Unitd kingdom
Uno, my tortoise died yesterday. He is with us for 3 months only but losing him is really unbearable. He is the one who helped me cope with my anxiety and depression. He makes me happy every single day. I cannot even go to the living room where he used to roam around and eat. I can imagine how he gets my attention whenever he is hungry. I missed calling him “Uno” and he is right in front of me after a few minutes. I have a lot of "what ifs" within me. I couldn't stop crying remembering how he looks at me every time he wants to eat or wants to play outside. I can see him every time I close my eyes. It keeps flashing to my head over and over again the moment I see him upside down in very hot weather. If only I check on him earlier. If only I didn’t allow him to go outside. If only I didn’t close the door. If only I was knowledgeable enough to know that he could possibly turn upside down, I could have avoided it. I don’t know what to feel or how to move on from this. My friends are telling me just to get another tortoise (even Uno's veterinarian is saying the same thing), but how can they say that? Do they even know how I feel right now? I may sound overacting, but it pains me to think how uno suffered and tried to call me for help. I don’t know how to move on from this.
Hello lovely Tanyao,
I’m so very sorry to hear of your loss. I can imagine very well the pain you are going through. I have to say, I personally get very cross when people suggest you simply ‘replace’ your beloved pet, as if that makes everything alright. It doesn’t, you need to have time and space to grieve. When you have been allowed to do that you will be ready to open your heart and give another tortoise all your love. But only you will know when that time is ripe. And you will have learned from this tragedy. It doesn’t make you a bad owner, just an inexperienced one.
I’m sending you all my love because I am also an inexperienced owner. But at least we love deeply and care enough.
 

bioteach

Member
10 Year Member!
Joined
Nov 11, 2010
Messages
43
Uno, my tortoise died yesterday. He is with us for 3 months only but losing him is really unbearable. He is the one who helped me cope with my anxiety and depression. He makes me happy every single day. I cannot even go to the living room where he used to roam around and eat. I can imagine how he gets my attention whenever he is hungry. I missed calling him “Uno” and he is right in front of me after a few minutes. I have a lot of "what ifs" within me. I couldn't stop crying remembering how he looks at me every time he wants to eat or wants to play outside. I can see him every time I close my eyes. It keeps flashing to my head over and over again the moment I see him upside down in very hot weather. If only I check on him earlier. If only I didn’t allow him to go outside. If only I didn’t close the door. If only I was knowledgeable enough to know that he could possibly turn upside down, I could have avoided it. I don’t know what to feel or how to move on from this. My friends are telling me just to get another tortoise (even Uno's veterinarian is saying the same thing), but how can they say that? Do they even know how I feel right now? I may sound overacting, but it pains me to think how uno suffered and tried to call me for help. I don’t know how to move on from this.
Please accept my sincerest condolences for the loss of Uno. I know how you feel because when I lost Timmy 10 years ago I cried for days. I raised him from a hatchling. He became entangled in some fencing and if I had seen him in time I could have rescued him. We can't be there every minute, and it is truly heartbreaking.

I did adopt another Desert Tortoise (Sunshine) who has thrived. I have been very careful to remove anything that could turn into a hazard, and even with that I check on her constantly. It takes time to adjust; and I truly hope that someday you can move forward from this sad event. I'll be thinking of you.
 

Obbie

Active Member
Joined
Apr 24, 2019
Messages
154
Location (City and/or State)
Minnesota
Uno, my tortoise died yesterday. He is with us for 3 months only but losing him is really unbearable. He is the one who helped me cope with my anxiety and depression. He makes me happy every single day. I cannot even go to the living room where he used to roam around and eat. I can imagine how he gets my attention whenever he is hungry. I missed calling him “Uno” and he is right in front of me after a few minutes. I have a lot of "what ifs" within me. I couldn't stop crying remembering how he looks at me every time he wants to eat or wants to play outside. I can see him every time I close my eyes. It keeps flashing to my head over and over again the moment I see him upside down in very hot weather. If only I check on him earlier. If only I didn’t allow him to go outside. If only I didn’t close the door. If only I was knowledgeable enough to know that he could possibly turn upside down, I could have avoided it. I don’t know what to feel or how to move on from this. My friends are telling me just to get another tortoise (even Uno's veterinarian is saying the same thing), but how can they say that? Do they even know how I feel right now? I may sound overacting, but it pains me to think how uno suffered and tried to call me for help. I don’t know how to move on from this.
Keep looking 🙏🏽, he/she may be happy outside, and not wander far.
 

kiarak01

New Member
Joined
Aug 3, 2022
Messages
7
Location (City and/or State)
Louisville, Kentucky
I am so sorry for your loss. Don't pressure yourself to get another tortoise right now, especially if you feel you aren't ready; you could never replace a loved one, anyway. He sounded absolutely lovely.
 

BernieL

Member
Joined
May 8, 2022
Messages
51
Location (City and/or State)
Indio, California
Uno, my tortoise died yesterday. He is with us for 3 months only but losing him is really unbearable. He is the one who helped me cope with my anxiety and depression. He makes me happy every single day. I cannot even go to the living room where he used to roam around and eat. I can imagine how he gets my attention whenever he is hungry. I missed calling him “Uno” and he is right in front of me after a few minutes. I have a lot of "what ifs" within me. I couldn't stop crying remembering how he looks at me every time he wants to eat or wants to play outside. I can see him every time I close my eyes. It keeps flashing to my head over and over again the moment I see him upside down in very hot weather. If only I check on him earlier. If only I didn’t allow him to go outside. If only I didn’t close the door. If only I was knowledgeable enough to know that he could possibly turn upside down, I could have avoided it. I don’t know what to feel or how to move on from this. My friends are telling me just to get another tortoise (even Uno's veterinarian is saying the same thing), but how can they say that? Do they even know how I feel right now? I may sound overacting, but it pains me to think how uno suffered and tried to call me for help. I don’t know how to move on from this.
Please don't blame yourself, lovelytanyao. You had the sort of sad accident that happens to every one of us at some point(s) in our lives. We can always say that if only we'd done this or realized that, such things might not have happened, but your experience shows they occurr despite the best affection, or caution such care or love creates. Uno's accident clearly wasn't because of anything that caring was able to forsee. At the same time, I don't think you're overreacting. You had a wonderful little creature, who seems to have had a wonderful-if short-time with you. You'll grieve, like we all do, when we lose someone we love. But that will heal, at least enough that you can go on living. And the gradual moving on must be a good thing, as you sure seem to be someone who has a lot to offer whatever other person or creature that may be lucky enough to come into your life.
 

New Posts

Top