I think most of us here share that same goal and the life of a tortoise and it's passing hits us all very hard. Maybe because they rely on us so much and we know it, maybe they just fill a spot of our heart we didn't know was empty.I want to have a tortoise so long that I pass it on in my will. I tend not to handle pet death well.
I've only recently now read your, "back-story" as it were and I'm very sorry for your loss. One important advantage to getting a hatchling or a young tortoise from a fellow member is you'll be able ask questions of them here on the forum and get good feedback from them as well as other members that know them.