weed rant

[kimbverly]

so this post isn’t really productive. it’s just a small rant, 1.) my dad mowed our backyard 2.) there’s apparently a “weed killer guy” that’s gonna come soon and bathe our backyard and front yard with weed killer.

so i’m 17 and still live with my parents and will continue to live with them during my freshman year in college. my parents know that i pick food from outside for my tortoise. my backyard is obviously the most accessible place for me to get weeds which from my understanding are the most nutritious, natural food you can feed your tortoise (not the ones that can be harmful, obviously). the ones that grow where i live are dandelions, mallow, henbit, thistle, and wild lettuce. it being spring, all of these started to grow out and i was so delighted i’d have some to feed my tortoise after an awful winter.

anyway i saw that he was mowing the lawn and i immediately ran outside and told him to not mow the weeds because i feed them to my tortoise. well? he did not care. he continued and said it was for the health of our lawn and that he needs to maintain it. he said that the weeds will continue to grow back and that they may even grow back faster because they’re weeds which obviously have a reputation.
so i was like ok whatever. i wasn’t feeling consoled whatsoever but plants do grow back. BUT then i was informed by my uncle who was also there that some guy is gonna come soon and spray all the weeds with weed killer. now to me, this was x10 more alarming then a simple mowing of the lawn. that would mean that i wouldn’t be able to pick more weeds from my backyard period. i told my dad to not let this guy come and spray our yard with weed killer please, and he said no. he said i could pick weeds from our neighbors, namely the neighbors next to us that don’t ever take care of their lawn. and this infuriated me even more, why would i go pick from someone else’s lawn if i could pick tortoise food from our own lawn? i asked him if having a nice lawn was more important to him then me utilizing the weeds for my tortoise and he said “well we need to take care of the lawn, take care of the house..”

i’m just so angry that he doesn’t care. what’s up with people wanting clean, boring, flat grass lawns??? would letting weeds grow freely really ‘damage’ our house?? (leaning towards NO) mowing the lawn is one thing, fine whatever, grass grows. but weed killer? that’s not something i could brush off. is weed killer really essential to keeping a somewhat decent lawn?(also, leaning towards NO)

i hate him.

 

[Daffodil]

It's hard to maintain a lawn. Once weeds establish a toehold, it is hard to eradicate them. So, I can understand your dad's predicament.

Could you ask him if you could have a certain area of the yard to grow your "garden" (that sounds a little better than "weeds."

 

[Dupré]

i would get something that’s self contained… bucket, planter, trough, old tire… and grow your own. i do this. have weeds in my lawn but i mow weekly.

 

[thompsono]

I made a couple wood rectangles I put around patches of my yard, and let them grow wild with whatever mix of grasses and weeds are there. Outside of those I pull weeds. No sprays ever.

 

[Tom]

This is a dilemma of rmany tortoise owners. My wife and I fight over this constantly. A nice thistle plant or clover patch will pop up and I watch it and let it grow. Then I come home and find it pulled out by the root just when it was getting large enough to harvest. So frustrating.

Different people have different priorities and want different things. It's silly for you to hate your dad. That's a bad thing. Feed your tortoise other stuff, and then get your butt to work at school and then at a job so you can make enough money to buy your own place and then you can grow all the weeds you want and keep all the toxic chemicals off of YOUR property. You can go buy weed seed and grow weeds on purpose on your own property! In the mean time, your dad should be able to treat his lawn however he wants and it's none of your business. It doesn't have to make sense to you or me. It's HIS lawn. He works hard to earn money and he's paying for that lawn in many ways. Property taxes, insurance, the mortgage payment, all the household bills, etc...

You can now let your dad know that since he's going make the yard toxic, that you are going to have to use his money to buy grocery store produce and all the proper supplements to add to the grocery store greens to make them as healthy and good for your tortoise as those free weeds that you used to be able to use.

Seriously though, I like the idea of asking permission to section off part of the yard for you to grow your own tortoise food stuff free from toxic chemicals. If he says "no", that's his prerogative. Just use that anger and frustration to succeed in school and work, so that you can get your own place that much sooner. Don't hate your dad over it. One day you will have kids and they will want to do something contrary to your wishes and you will have to tell them no. Would you want your kids to hate you over it? Take a deep breath or two and remember all the good things your dad has done for you all your life. That man would kill or die for you without a second thought. That is not someone you should hate just because they don't bend to your every whim. It's all a matter of perspective and you've lost yours. There is nothing more important and precious than your family. You can feed your tortoise something else until you get your own lawn to do with what you please. In the mean time thank your dad for giving you a place to live, food to eat, and a pet tortoise to love and care for. Not everyone get's those things, and not everyone gets a dad. Focus on all that you have, and let go of the things that you don't have control over.

 

[kimbverly]

It's hard to maintain a lawn. Once weeds establish a toehold, it is hard to eradicate them. So, I can understand your dad's predicament.

Could you ask him if you could have a certain area of the yard to grow your "garden" (that sounds a little better than "weeds."

the majority of henbit and mallow grow under the backyard porch, i think i can ask him to leave that alone :/ i’ll have to say bye to all the other natural dandelion greens and flowers that grow though

 

[kimbverly]

i would get something that’s self contained… bucket, planter, trough, old tire… and grow your own. i do this. have weeds in my lawn but i mow weekly.

do they come back every spring? what do you grow? i think this is what i’ll have to do

 

[kimbverly]

I made a couple wood rectangles I put around patches of my yard, and let them grow wild with whatever mix of grasses and weeds are there. Outside of those I pull weeds. No sprays ever.

this is pretty smart! how big are the sectioned off areas?

 

[kimbverly]

This is a dilemma of rmany tortoise owners. My wife and I fight over this constantly. A nice thistle plant or clover patch will pop up and I watch it and let it grow. Then I come home and find it pulled out by the root just when it was getting large enough to harvest. So frustrating.

Different people have different priorities and want different things. It's silly for you to hate your dad. That's a bad thing. Feed your tortoise other stuff, and then get your butt to work at school and then at a job so you can make enough money to buy your own place and then you can grow all the weeds you want and keep all the toxic chemicals off of YOUR property. You can go buy weed seed and grow weeds on purpose on your own property! In the mean time, your dad should be able to treat his lawn however he wants and it's none of your business. It doesn't have to make sense to you or me. It's HIS lawn. He works hard to earn money and he's paying for that lawn in many ways. Property taxes, insurance, the mortgage payment, all the household bills, etc...

yea i guess so it is his lawn. this is a tough pill to swallow.

You can now let your dad know that since he's going make the yard toxic, that you are going to have to use his money to buy grocery store produce and all the proper supplements to add to the grocery store greens to make them as healthy and good for your tortoise as those free weeds that you used to be able to use.

i’ll definitely tell him, i also might ask for some money to buy more gardening supplies and weeds that are separate from the lawn. i’ve tried to grow calendula, pansy, some seeds from the tortoise supply testudo mix and chia from seed but all my seedlings died, kind of don’t know why (ok maybe i know why, i watered them less frequently, maybe not enough light, maybe they needed to be transplanted). the picture below is of them before they died. i planted new pansy, calendula, and coleus seeds by a window this time with the same grow light and a different soil seed mix. the pansy and calendula have already sprouted. i hope they survive and grow until i can take them outside. i still have a surviving calendula plant from this picture and im waiting until april ends to put outside. i’m really bad at growing plants unfortunately but hopefully third time’s a charm.

Seriously though, I like the idea of asking permission to section off part of the yard for you to grow your own tortoise food stuff free from toxic chemicals. If he says "no", that's his prerogative. Just use that anger and frustration to succeed in school and work, so that you can get your own place that much sooner.

sectioning off a part of it would be great, i want to preserve the mallow and henbit most of all, i’ll see if he will agree to that.

Don't hate your dad over it. One day you will have kids and they will want to do something contrary to your wishes and you will have to tell them no. Would you want your kids to hate you over it? Take a deep breath or two and remember all the good things your dad has done for you all your life. That man would kill or die for you without a second thought. That is not someone you should hate just because they don't bend to your every whim. It's all a matter of perspective and you've lost yours.

this is fair, it’s just very frustrating to have to put this onto my pile of worries.

Focus on all that you have, and let go of the things that you don't have control over.

you’re right, i need to keep this way of thinking. i don’t think this issue is worth making my dad upset. i couldn’t help but feel angry and betrayed but that’s not really mature or productive at all.
i suppose i’ll have to grow my own stuff via planters outside and ask if the mallow and henbit could be spared. i’ll also increase the walks i have with my friends where they help me forage for food items (they think it’s a very enjoyable activity )
this is very much besides the point but i do also need a job.. in fact i’ve been thinking about this for quite a while, since for the majority of my teen years i’ve been working, but i haven’t this past year at all. i’m also turning 18 soon meaning i can have more control over my savings (drained by my mother, gotten into several family arguments over this) and roth ira (haven’t had much money to invest into, im the only one that has contributed to it since i was 14). i’ll also need a credit card soon. kind of behind on schoolwork which is bad because i have a scholarship to maintain. so many things to do i just don’t know how to handle it all sometimes

 

[Littleredfootbigredheart]

lol there’s weeds in the garden where our red foot lives and I always have to convince them to leave a patch, the amount of times I’ve visited and they’ve been mowedluckily there’s a nice planter out there I’m going to move some of them to this year and I’m lucky they don’t use any sprays, it’s tricky when it’s not your garden but you can only do your best, definitely don’t fall out over it

 

[Tom]

i’ve tried to grow calendula, pansy, some seeds from the tortoise supply testudo mix and chia from seed but all my seedlings died,

Start them all outside in the sun after the weather is warm enough. In hot dry climates like ours, plants don't survive when started inside and then moved outside, but they do just fine if sprouted and started outside. All the ones you mentioned need strong bright light. This is not easy to do indoors. Keep trying and keep learning, and you will get better at it as time goes by. I wasn't very good at it either when I started, but I learned how to get it right over time.

 

[RosemaryDW]

what do you grow?

When I still did this in my garden I saved the seed heads from common weeds through the spring and summer. For snow thistles and prickly lettuce you can cut the heads off while they are still fairly yellow and they'll still set seed (turn gray and fluffy). Let the seed heads dry out fully and store in a paper envelope. Spread thinly in your plot in early spring and don't overwater them. You might try adding a very little of the testudo mix if you have room. I mean a very little, those plants will crowd everything out, including the weeds you know you can be successful with.

You've probably already heard this but you can't expect to control another man's house; you'll have to save that for your own home. Sounds like you have a plan, good luck!

 

[The_Four_Toed_Edward]

yea i guess so it is his lawn. this is a tough pill to swallow.

i’ll definitely tell him, i also might ask for some money to buy more gardening supplies and weeds that are separate from the lawn. i’ve tried to grow calendula, pansy, some seeds from the tortoise supply testudo mix and chia from seed but all my seedlings died, kind of don’t know why (ok maybe i know why, i watered them less frequently, maybe not enough light, maybe they needed to be transplanted). the picture below is of them before they died. i planted new pansy, calendula, and coleus seeds by a window this time with the same grow light and a different soil seed mix. the pansy and calendula have already sprouted. i hope they survive and grow until i can take them outside. i still have a surviving calendula plant from this picture and im waiting until april ends to put outside. i’m really bad at growing plants unfortunately but hopefully third time’s a charm.
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sectioning off a part of it would be great, i want to preserve the mallow and henbit most of all, i’ll see if he will agree to that.

this is fair, it’s just very frustrating to have to put this onto my pile of worries.


you’re right, i need to keep this way of thinking. i don’t think this issue is worth making my dad upset. i couldn’t help but feel angry and betrayed but that’s not really mature or productive at all.
i suppose i’ll have to grow my own stuff via planters outside and ask if the mallow and henbit could be spared. i’ll also increase the walks i have with my friends where they help me forage for food items (they think it’s a very enjoyable activity )
this is very much besides the point but i do also need a job.. in fact i’ve been thinking about this for quite a while, since for the majority of my teen years i’ve been working, but i haven’t this past year at all. i’m also turning 18 soon meaning i can have more control over my savings (drained by my mother, gotten into several family arguments over this) and roth ira (haven’t had much money to invest into, im the only one that has contributed to it since i was 14). i’ll also need a credit card soon. kind of behind on schoolwork which is bad because i have a scholarship to maintain. so many things to do i just don’t know how to handle it all sometimes

Hope that there is someone in your life you can tell all these things you are stressed about. It helps surprisingly.