Why do some folks get "angry" when they get old?

[jeff kushner]

We're all friends here and a pretty frank group.....so, we've all seen them as we grew up, folks who just seemed to get bitter with age.
Why does that happen? It doesn't happen to all of us but it's kind of obvious that it happens to a lot of folks. So, discounting illness or disease....Why?

When I was a young kid, I thought "mean old people" were the ones that were mad that they weren't young anymore.

When I was a young adult I thought folks got mean if they regretted too many things.

When I was a responsible adult and began to have a little change in my pocket, I thought it was because they are poor.

When I was a Father of 3, I thought it was because they (the mean old people) weren't accepting of new ideas, fashions etc.

Now I'm one of the older folks and still don't have a clue why some folks get so nasty. They seem to have everything they want, yet they aren't happy at all? What gives with that?

 

[ZEROPILOT]

For me, it's pain associated with aging.
If I'm in pain. The level of what I perceive to be BS that I'm willing to tolerate is pretty low.

 

[TammyJ]

Posts like this just make me furious 🤬

 

[TammyJ]

Posts like this just make me furious 🤬

How old are you again Tammy?

 

[wellington]

I think it's a mix of things. Pain, like Zeropilot said. Lack of ability to do things easier, lack of being able to do some things period, lack of human contact.
I don't think it's really one thing unless it's a disease. But I also don't think most of them think they are mean, have changed either.

 

[mark1]

older you get the more people you've had to deal with......

 

[TammyJ]

older you get the more people you've had to deal with......

Very true, but most of them are gone and you're still here! Lol. Seriously though, I think it really is a combination of things like Wellington said.

 

[jaizei]

Idk its kinda aspirational. I can't wait, another 20-25 years and I can be as crotchety of an old man as I want. Like John McLaughlin

 

[TammyJ]

Some old folks are not really as miserable as they make out to be. They feel like they have earned the right to be cranky. OK. CROTCHETY. Love that word. And most of them (us) have indeed earned it, so... Don't just pass them by and stare... like you didn't care ..say hello in there...hello! (Anyone remember Joan Baez?)

 

[SuzanneZ]

We're all friends here and a pretty frank group.....so, we've all seen them as we grew up, folks who just seemed to get bitter with age.
Why does that happen? It doesn't happen to all of us but it's kind of obvious that it happens to a lot of folks. So, discounting illness or disease....Why?

When I was a young kid, I thought "mean old people" were the ones that were mad that they weren't young anymore.

When I was a young adult I thought folks got mean if they regretted too many things.

When I was a responsible adult and began to have a little change in my pocket, I thought it was because they are poor.

When I was a Father of 3, I thought it was because they (the mean old people) weren't accepting of new ideas, fashions etc.

Now I'm one of the older folks and still don't have a clue why some folks get so nasty. They seem to have everything they want, yet they aren't happy at all? What gives with that?

Each of those thoughts is more than likely true. Maybe how someone was raised with great expectations and nothing turned out as they hoped or as they'd been told. Disappointment with the world.
People who have no spiritual life to give them hope. People who have given up the pretense of caring. They just don't anymore. A few would feel entitled to be jerks because they're old and earned that one perk.

Good thing I've always loved elderly people (knew all four of my grandparents for a long time and have had several good old friends). I am one now. Just yesterday I was 26.

 

[SuzanneZ]

Some old folks are not really as miserable as they make out to be. They feel like they have earned the right to be cranky. OK. CROTCHETY. Love that word. And most of them (us) have indeed earned it, so... Don't just pass them by and stare... like you didn't care ..say hello in there...hello! (Anyone remember Joan Baez?)

Me. Saw her in concert in Hattiesburg MS. Dylan showed up for a song. Earth Wind and Fire was g o o d.

 

[Cathie G]

Each of those thoughts is more than likely true. Maybe how someone was raised with great expectations and nothing turned out as they hoped or as they'd been told. Disappointment with the world.
People who have no spiritual life to give them hope. People who have given up the pretense of caring. They just don't anymore. A few would feel entitled to be jerks because they're old and earned that one perk.

Good thing I've always loved elderly people (knew all four of my grandparents for a long time and have had several good old friends). I am one now. Just yesterday I was 26.

Really 🤗

 

[Cathie G]

I'll admit I'm cranky and crochety at times I've earned the right though. Hay I'm getting old. So don't expect me to get up and fix your dinner. If we can share the work we'll have a blast. And I won't become evil.🤔

 

[Maggie3fan]

Each of those thoughts is more than likely true. Maybe how someone was raised with great expectations and nothing turned out as they hoped or as they'd been told. Disappointment with the world.
People who have no spiritual life to give them hope. People who have given up the pretense of caring. They just don't anymore. A few would feel entitled to be jerks because they're old and earned that one perk.

Good thing I've always loved elderly people (knew all four of my grandparents for a long time and have had several good old friends). I am one now. Just yesterday I was 26.

Disappointed is the top of my list. I'm at the end sorta and I feel...is that all there is??? Mostly with me, I'm just afraid 24/7 that my very old age is gonna suck

 

[jeff kushner]

The responses generally seem to run along the same vein.....thanks guys, I always appreciate other views.

The girl at Dr Chiro's office yesterday had a completely different view. She is around 40-45....she said;(paraphrased)

"Maybe it's the same % of old people that are nasty as there are middle-age and young people but since you are only looking at one group, you might be missing that that ratio of nasty folks to good ones, might be the same across all demographics"

Hmmmmm, not bad insight for a receptionist, right? AND she makes a very good point.

Fear is not nastiness Mags, give yourself a break, you're a pretty cool chick to me and you sure aren't mean or nasty, just poor....it's ok,

 

[TammyJ]

Disappointed is the top of my list. I'm at the end sorta and I feel...is that all there is??? Mostly with me, I'm just afraid 24/7 that my very old age is gonna suck

Yes, disappointed. At 75, I am disappointed with a lot of things, such as the continued hostilities between people and countries, the greed and ingratitude I see. But most of all, with myself. That personal disappointment takes the cake, and it's a bitter one, and it gets passed on as anger to my audience (folks around me) . Guess all old people have a bit of it along with a few good memories of things we did right. You young people out there, try to make good memories to live on when you are older. You can't go back.

 

[Cathie G]

I am disappointed also. You always think while you're young that stuff will get better and guess what it won't. We're stuck. The best thing to do is enjoy each and every moment anyway. I wish it hadn't taken so long for me to realize that. I would have had even more fun than I already have.🤗

 

[Blackdog1714]

I was at Walmart getting a prescription filled just waiting in line when I heard the baby screaming then finally saw it. Mom had two in a cart and one was red faced screaming-probably pretty sick. So Mom looks and me at chirps" Are you in line cause it like way up there and you are not even close!" It was loud and brusk so I gave the only response I felt would work- "I am sorry" then I moved up closer. I could see her last nerve and I was not twanging it. Daily I work at being more pleasant in public- this is mostly for personal growth, but also in response to how our worlds has changed since Covid. More flies with Honey. I am a work in progress.

 

[Cathie G]

I was at Walmart getting a prescription filled just waiting in line when I heard the baby screaming then finally saw it. Mom had two in a cart and one was red faced screaming-probably pretty sick. So Mom looks and me at chirps" Are you in line cause it like way up there and you are not even close!" It was loud and brusk so I gave the only response I felt would work- "I am sorry" then I moved up closer. I could see her last nerve and I was not twanging it. Daily I work at being more pleasant in public- this is mostly for personal growth, but also in response to how our worlds has changed since Covid. More flies with Honey. I am a work in progress.

I think we tend to blame COVID for anything we can just for GP.😁 But some people are just plain rude. Id probably have done the same. Am I a mean old lady 🙃?😁yep been there done that.

 

[TechnoCheese]

Lead poisoning