COLD DARK ROOM

jeff kushner

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But I CAN imagine because of my accident in my big truck.The nerves and tendons had been cut and my wrist was broken. It was a workman's comp accident in 2003. My pain level was daily 7-8 then there's the days when the pain was off the charts...so here came the Oxycontin...now it's 2022 and I don't need much help with the pain. Sometimes it really hurts, but mostly it aches some rarely bad, but it took years. I sympathize

I'm a little slow, as most folks soon notice....did you chance your screen name Mags? I like it!
 

Ray--Opo

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But I CAN imagine because of my accident in my big truck.The nerves and tendons had been cut and my wrist was broken. It was a workman's comp accident in 2003. My pain level was daily 7-8 then there's the days when the pain was off the charts...so here came the Oxycontin...now it's 2022 and I don't need much help with the pain. Sometimes it really hurts, but mostly it aches some rarely bad, but it took years. I sympathize
That gives me hope that over time the nerves will settle down. I am sitting here alternating between heat pad and cold pad on my arm. Waiting for my new lawn care guy to show up. He said he would be here first thing in the morning. Got a feeling he won't be my lawn care person for very long. This isn't the first time he hasn't showed up.
 
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Cathie G

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Good morning all, it's a bright sunny day here so I'm feeling better about things and put out calls to more tradesmen who may be able to help me get to the point where the roof can be fixed.
At the end of the day I have no one to blame but myself - I have put things off with the back of the house until I haven't known where to start -so not started anything. This leak in the roof is the most serious thing I've had to deal with and is the catalyst for getting other things done. The frustrating thing is finding people to do the work.
Anyway I hope you all have a peaceful Sunday and I'll see you later.
Well... I think you've done what you could and so now you feel like you can deal with it 😘
 

Cathie G

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I'm really sorry for what you are going through about Joe. How dare other people even offer an opinion about what you are doing! You clearly look after him very well - even looking at his amazing paintings shows how settled and happy he must be - I should think they would be very glad that he is having such a great life with you.
Angie
Like I said and if they want to do it they can have him hahaha 😂 that shuts them up too 😜😉😋
 

Cathie G

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I think I am stuck with the phantom pains. The worst is at the tip of my right arm where the hand and wrist was.The throbbing pain is 24/7. Pain killers relieve the pain by 50%. But the pain persists all day everyday. Its not really a phantom pain. But I do experience phantom pains in my arm.I did go to a different orthopedic surgeon who specializes in phantom pains and nerve pains. He put me on a med and told me to ask my primary doctor. If it's ok to start taking celabrex. If these meds don't help, there is a implant that will fool the nerves going to my arm. If I could get some relief in my arm the battle would be halfway over. I am thankful my right leg phantom pains only happens 2 or 3 times a week.
I'll be hoping and praying you get a good solution.It seems like the implant would be something to consider. That might be a better way. You wouldn't have to take so many pain killers. I hate them🤗.
 

Cathie G

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I would never, well almost never tell you what you should do...but I want to give you a hint...my telephone answer machine says this when anybody calls " Hi, this is Maggie...looks like I'm not going to answer the phone right now, so you should know what to do... or I just take the receiver off the hook .My tv reads the caller id and puts it on my tv. So and do is calling on the screen. BUT I'm not sure I could not answer my sis. But she would never .ever try and tell me what to do. Except once about 34 years ago when she told me I hadda stop drinking "or else". Boy oh boy. I'm sorry your sister has crossed the line oh and no narcotics
My phone announces too but I have to spell it in a way that the phone can speak...if that makes any sense. For instance if I want to call someone dork boy I have to make sure the voice on my phone can speak English somewhat hahaha and I have to spell it that way 😁 have you gotten the ones labeled invalid number yet. I know you have. I've had a plenty 😁 that's why I paired the announcement with the jingle bells ringtone 😁
 

Ray--Opo

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I'll be hoping and praying you get a good solution.It seems like the implant would be something to consider. That might be a better way. You wouldn't have to take so many pain killers. I hate them🤗.
I totally dislike the pain killers. I used to go to AA meetings. But now I feel like a hypocrite. Since I do have a addictive personality. I safe guard myself by having Rose monitor my meds. I think I would be responsible but don't want to take the chance. Some people in AA understand, while some do not. It's uncomfortable for me to claim a sobriety date of 7/5 / 2003. Which is true for alcohol but not for pain killers.
 

Cathie G

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I totally dislike the pain killers. I used to go to AA meetings. But now I feel like a hypocrite. Since I do have a addictive personality. I safe guard myself by having Rose monitor my meds. I think I would be responsible but don't want to take the chance. Some people in AA understand, while some do not. It's uncomfortable for me to claim a sobriety date of 7/5 / 2003. Which is true for alcohol but not for pain killers.
Pain killers just make me sick. Even regular over the counter Tylenol and it is best if someone else makes sure I'm taking the right amount. But if I have to I just put how many I can have in 24 hours in my fat toad farm jar 😁😘 and do a time log on paper too. Thank the good Lord you have a Rose and she has a Ray 💗 and Opo.
 

jeff kushner

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I totally dislike the pain killers. I used to go to AA meetings. But now I feel like a hypocrite. Since I do have a addictive personality. I safe guard myself by having Rose monitor my meds. I think I would be responsible but don't want to take the chance. Some people in AA understand, while some do not. It's uncomfortable for me to claim a sobriety date of 7/5 / 2003. Which is true for alcohol but not for pain killers.
Before I say this, there are some folks that should stay far away from any addictive drugs, they go haywire and are "off to the races"....this is NOT for them!

I actually wrote something similar the other day, then deleted it...but maybe now it's time I say something.

Let me ease your mind Ray, my date is Aug 29, 1991....so I have more than a minute of "time". I still attend & occasionally get asked to speak at meetings. I even go over at Kerry's. I go when I feel sketchy or when my head thinks it doesn't need to help others. I know darned well that the culture at the meeting is to cringe at "dual dates" or you'll hear "go to na" subtlety whispered. Or, you simply hide that drug use inside and don't admit it to anyone even though you should talk with your sponsor. (It's my job to remind you about those things-brother LOL) I know the drill my friend...and since I deal with migraine on a Superman level, I know the guilt! See, I'm not just an owner, I'm a customer too! LOL

I no longer take narcs as I found a couple of the tryptamine's are most effective (you might want to try them, long as you have a Superman heart) but for a few years I would take 2-4 vic's for each headache, or take a drive to the local ER for a shot of Morphine. Today is different. The headaches are still like they were, I just found a better way

I know that some things, like drug addiction CAN be managed in most cases like yours, where real and immediate debilitating pain is concerned. You're a smart guy, you already know the cost. As long as complete honesty(a tough hurdle for any addict) in your own mind is forefront, you can successfully use narcotics for an extended period of time. We both were taught about "fear" being the only thing in life that causes us to do bad stuff, right?.....don't fear feeling better, simply make fear manageable for you....and your wife, SHE is going to be VERY concerned with anything that she sees threatening your 19 yrs. That whole honesty thing and the honesty-credit you've built over the course of your relationship will become front and center.

BUT, you will get sick when you stop and "drug sick" sucks. For Gods sake, don't put yourself through hell cause you are worried about sobriety.....your time....19 yrs...that's cause you found a better way....and you love Rose deeply. You aren't tossing that away.

I had to convince my terminal best friend years ago to go ahead, take the meds! I told him the truth, that for him there was little downside...."it ain't like we're gonna have to stuff you in s rehab in heaven, right?"

You aren't going to die though Ray so you look at the big picture and decide how to deal with it.....but don't feel guilty brother.....you aren't!
 

Maggie3fan

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Before I say this, there are some folks that should stay far away from any addictive drugs, they go haywire and are "off to the races"....this is NOT for them!

I actually wrote something similar the other day, then deleted it...but maybe now it's time I say something.

Let me ease your mind Ray, my date is Aug 29, 1991....so I have more than a minute of "time". I still attend & occasionally get asked to speak at meetings. I even go over at Kerry's. I go when I feel sketchy or when my head thinks it doesn't need to help others. I know darned well that the culture at the meeting is to cringe at "dual dates" or you'll hear "go to na" subtlety whispered. Or, you simply hide that drug use inside and don't admit it to anyone even though you should talk with your sponsor. (It's my job to remind you about those things-brother LOL) I know the drill my friend...and since I deal with migraine on a Superman level, I know the guilt! See, I'm not just an owner, I'm a customer too! LOL

I no longer take narcs as I found a couple of the tryptamine's are most effective (you might want to try them, long as you have a Superman heart) but for a few years I would take 2-4 vic's for each headache, or take a drive to the local ER for a shot of Morphine. Today is different. The headaches are still like they were, I just found a better way

I know that some things, like drug addiction CAN be managed in most cases like yours, where real and immediate debilitating pain is concerned. You're a smart guy, you already know the cost. As long as complete honesty(a tough hurdle for any addict) in your own mind is forefront, you can successfully use narcotics for an extended period of time. We both were taught about "fear" being the only thing in life that causes us to do bad stuff, right?.....don't fear feeling better, simply make fear manageable for you....and your wife, SHE is going to be VERY concerned with anything that she sees threatening your 19 yrs. That whole honesty thing and the honesty-credit you've built over the course of your relationship will become front and center.

BUT, you will get sick when you stop and "drug sick" sucks. For Gods sake, don't put yourself through hell cause you are worried about sobriety.....your time....19 yrs...that's cause you found a better way....and you love Rose deeply. You aren't tossing that away.

I had to convince my terminal best friend years ago to go ahead, take the meds! I told him the truth, that for him there was little downside...."it ain't like we're gonna have to stuff you in s rehab in heaven, right?"

You aren't going to die though Ray so you look at the big picture and decide how to deal with it.....but don't feel guilty brother.....you aren't!
Beautiful..
 

Cathie G

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Well... my little Downy woodpecker still loves the feeder and that chickadee too. I've set up the camera to try and get a picture of my new visitor. The dang bird acts like a woodpecker but is so dull and drab. I'm thinking it's some kind of flicker. But I did get this.🤗
View attachment 1668461908306.mp4
 

jeff kushner

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That's pretty good film Ms Cathie!

My leaf guys are here so the whole house is vibrating with their huge blowers. I swear, they must see me sitting at the keyboard so they fire up the machine and set it under my window? LOL......no, they have a hard $, they want to go home too!

Little Matilda is at Defcon 1! She does not like it!
 

Cathie G

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That's pretty good film Ms Cathie!

My leaf guys are here so the whole house is vibrating with their huge blowers. I swear, they must see me sitting at the keyboard so they fire up the machine and set it under my window? LOL......no, they have a hard $, they want to go home too!

Little Matilda is at Defcon 1! She does not like it!
Thank you. I just love that short video. I got two birds with one stone 😂. The lighting was perfect naturally. I lucked out for once. I WILL get one of that new bird that acts like a woodpecker but doesn't look like one. She'll be back. She was loving my tree to death. I was too busy trying to figure out what in the heck she is to get a picture that time 😁
 

Ray--Opo

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Pain killers just make me sick. Even regular over the counter Tylenol and it is best if someone else makes sure I'm taking the right amount. But if I have to I just put how many I can have in 24 hours in my fat toad farm jar 😁😘 and do a time log on paper too. Thank the good Lord you have a Rose and she has a Ray 💗 and Opo.
I am so thankful for Rose and of course the master Opo.
Rose has some operations coming up. The first will be a hysterectomy and the other will be fusing 2 of her vertebraes in her neck. She missed her trip to Greece because she was in the hospital. Now she has canceled her trip to S. Africa next year for the hysterectomy. We are trying to figure out her neck procedure. So she doesn't have to cancel a trip to San Diego next year. Also a trip next year to Japan and S. Korea.
Before I say this, there are some folks that should stay far away from any addictive drugs, they go haywire and are "off to the races"....this is NOT for them!

I actually wrote something similar the other day, then deleted it...but maybe now it's time I say something.

Let me ease your mind Ray, my date is Aug 29, 1991....so I have more than a minute of "time". I still attend & occasionally get asked to speak at meetings. I even go over at Kerry's. I go when I feel sketchy or when my head thinks it doesn't need to help others. I know darned well that the culture at the meeting is to cringe at "dual dates" or you'll hear "go to na" subtlety whispered. Or, you simply hide that drug use inside and don't admit it to anyone even though you should talk with your sponsor. (It's my job to remind you about those things-brother LOL) I know the drill my friend...and since I deal with migraine on a Superman level, I know the guilt! See, I'm not just an owner, I'm a customer too! LOL

I no longer take narcs as I found a couple of the tryptamine's are most effective (you might want to try them, long as you have a Superman heart) but for a few years I would take 2-4 vic's for each headache, or take a drive to the local ER for a shot of Morphine. Today is different. The headaches are still like they were, I just found a better way

I know that some things, like drug addiction CAN be managed in most cases like yours, where real and immediate debilitating pain is concerned. You're a smart guy, you already know the cost. As long as complete honesty(a tough hurdle for any addict) in your own mind is forefront, you can successfully use narcotics for an extended period of time. We both were taught about "fear" being the only thing in life that causes us to do bad stuff, right?.....don't fear feeling better, simply make fear manageable for you....and your wife, SHE is going to be VERY concerned with anything that she sees threatening your 19 yrs. That whole honesty thing and the honesty-credit you've built over the course of your relationship will become front and center.

BUT, you will get sick when you stop and "drug sick" sucks. For Gods sake, don't put yourself through hell cause you are worried about sobriety.....your time....19 yrs...that's cause you found a better way....and you love Rose deeply. You aren't tossing that away.

I had to convince my terminal best friend years ago to go ahead, take the meds! I told him the truth, that for him there was little downside...."it ain't like we're gonna have to stuff you in s rehab in heaven, right?"

You aren't going to die though Ray so you look at the big picture and decide how to deal with it.....but don't feel guilty brother.....you aren't!
Thanks Jeff, I really appreciate the suggestions and comparisons.
 

Ray--Opo

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Well... my little Downy woodpecker still loves the feeder and that chickadee too. I've set up the camera to try and get a picture of my new visitor. The dang bird acts like a woodpecker but is so dull and drab. I'm thinking it's some kind of flicker. But I did get this.🤗
View attachment 351791
A friend of mine who is a avid bird watcher said: It's either a Downy or a Hairy Woodpecker , the main difference is in size, the Downy is 61/2" and the Hairy is 91/2" in size.
 

Ray--Opo

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Hey guys! Sorry I've been gone for a while, its been soooo busy! Birthdays, holidays, and just days in general! So long question short, how is everyone and what did I miss?
Glad to see you back. It seems to me everybody's busy here in the CDR. I myself have been part timing It here and have noticed that it has become less populated. 🤔
 

Cathie G

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A friend of mine who is a avid bird watcher said: It's either a Downy or a Hairy Woodpecker , the main difference is in size, the Downy is 61/2" and the Hairy is 91/2" in size.
Yes but I haven't gotten a picture of the new one yet. I saw the hairy woodpecker online and it doesn't look like the one I'm trying to get a picture of. It is about 91/2" but has the coloring of a sparrow. I've never seen a woodpecker that looks like this one in my life. It's definitely a woodpecker of some sort though because it was hanging on the tree and pecking it like a woodpecker ☺️ I'll post a picture if I can get one but I sadly haven't seen the bird today. They usually revisit once they find my tree though.
 

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