Getting Over A Death

[wellington]

I was just wondering how you have gotten over some of the worst animal deaths in your life. I just posted part of what I did on a different thread, thats what made me think to ask others. I had lost my very best four legged friend, love of my life Karashay, one of my first Chinese Shar-pei in 1993. I had tried everything to get over her. In 1994 I post a memorial in the book "Who's Who in Animals", didn't work. Finally, in 2003, 10 years later I decided to get a tattoo of her. Spent a lot of time making the stencil and finding the right person. It came out to look just like her. Although I still have a hard time talking about her sometimes, the tattoo has helped a lot. She and I had been through a lot together and if not for her love and always being there for me, I am not sure if I would have been able to be here today. She was one of those dogs everyone dreams of. Would crawl into my skin if she could have. The love between us was not unnoticed by anyone. As you can see I loved her very much and still miss her, but I am for the most part over the death and she will never be loss, as she is with me forever.

 

[Maggie Cummings]

I don't think you ever do get over it. I loved my Big Bubba beyond anything and still cry about his death almost 3 years later.

 

[wellington]

I don't think you ever do get over it. I loved my Big Bubba beyond anything and still cry about his death almost 3 years later.

I know what you mean. You don't really get over it, it just gets a little easier. Is Bubba one of your torts?

 

[dmarcus]

I agree, I still miss my Chinchilla that passed away in 2004...

 

[Maggie Cummings]

I don't think you ever do get over it. I loved my Big Bubba beyond anything and still cry about his death almost 3 years later.

I know what you mean. You don't really get over it, it just gets a little easier. Is Bubba one of your torts?

No, Bubba was my 28 pound mean as a snake cat. I was a long distance truck driver and he was my co-driver for quite a number of years. Then I got injured on the job and couldn't work anymore. He used to walk with a harness and a leash. He's walked on the ground in every state but Alaska. I used to take him out every day so he could eat grass and stuff. I could take him clear to the other side of a truck stop parking lot with 200 trucks take him off leash and 80% of the time he could find his own truck. He would walk pretty good without a leash. He wasn't afraid of anything, except prairie dogs and big birds. He was attacked by sea gulls in a rest stop in Kansas so that forever made him afraid of birds, and he ran with the prairie dogs outside of Denver. He didn't like the wind in Wyoming and I would throw him in the snow banks in rest stops. I had so much fun with him, I trusted him. He didn't act like any other cat. He would listen to commands and he would pay attention to me in public. I could tell so many stories about him I could bore people to death. When he was 16 he got a respiratory infection and had a hard time breathing. My Vet, who I really trusted, had me administer, oh heck I'm forgetting it now and the keys are getting hard to see. The stuff that asthmatics use in their breathers...albuteral? Moving on... I gave him half a dose and stopped because it was stressing him out, when I called her and told her that she said he was just spoiled and to finish the dose, I did, one of the few times I didn't listen to my instincts, and I exploded his heart. He was my best friend and I still love him so, it was so horrible to kill my Bubs like thatand I have to go now...

 

[ascott]

My Spike died 9-23-95, he was the first and only dog that I could and would ever say I was in love with....he was tenacious, lovingly obnoxious and so loving and loyal and was always cuddled by my side, he would lay under my bed on the cool tile floor during the summer and snore and fart and he when I would leave for the day and then return home I would find some of my clothes he would gather during the day and pile on the floor under the bed where I could see he slept on them....my little Spike passed moments before I could save him...I even tried to give him mouth to mouth..but to not avail he passed....I still to this day miss him and his short strong loving loyal friendship....

Rest in Peace my loving buddy.

 

[tweeter]

My heart horse was put down on October 31, 1985. To this day, I can't think about him, let alone talk about him without my eyes leaking. Even now my eyes are getting full. sorry.

 

[Yvonne G]

Quite a few years ago I lost my Sophie. She was a doberman that I raised from a very small puppy. She just died of natural causes, but we were together a long time and I really, really loved her. Sophie, sophie, my sophie. That's how I always used to say her name.

 

[grogansilver]

I'm sorry for all your losses! Death to me haunts my life forever. today i shouldn't be here but i am! as i worked my job every day for the last ten years of my life, i got to see Death come in so many ways! when i work for the morgue it was my job! it was my way of making a living and providing for my family every morning i would wake up and go to work and see somebody new laying there before me,a new face (Person) that i didn't know but it was sad to me to see that their life had ended, it always touched my heart! The Day 911 struck i spent many hours every day in both places down by ground zero and in my facility. working 12 hour shifts every day. that Day of the tragedy i was suppose to respond to those buildings in which i asked my Boss could i go? it was what i wanted! and was trained for! and he told me no, he said to me that he needed me here at the command center, which i stayed. knowing me that day i would of been in those Buildings helping people get out and today i wouldn't be here but i am! am i grateful for my Bosses Decision he made for me to stay, yes and no! that day and every day afterwords and still till this today i suffer in many ways! Emotionally,Physically,Mentally. will i ever get over seeing Death itself for the rest of my life No! I tried to avoid this posting But i couldn't because it haunted me. I'm sorry for speaking my mind so openly its just the way i feel when i see people suffer from death itself and cry out for help, may it be an Animal or Person. "Peace" Bye Anthony.

 

[oscar]

I lost my best animal friend in mid Nov. He was a dachshund we had adopted
him 6 years ago and were his at least third owner. He had issues that were
probably from being mistreated, We have had other dogs. but thunder I would
refer to as my boy and have never felt for an animal as I did him, maybe because he was mistreated i don't really know. Anyway it has been six weeks
and am still very upset about loosing him.

 

[Sammy]

I lost my Boby in March, met him outside the office ten years ago, he was very dirty & sick. Vet said he was 4 years old at that time. Took nearly a year for him to recover from everything. Boby was not just a pet dog to me, he's my loving son. He's gentle nature, with animals & kids made him very popular with the neighbors. This year he was crippled by arthritis, vets said he is very old, his body is giving up on him. Then he stopped eating and drinking, vet said there's a tumor on his kidney. His suffering was like fire burning my heart. Lastly I had to put him down, I felt like I killed him. I miss him so sorely, can't even walk down the street where we went walkies without tears filling my eyes. Not a day has past without him in my thoughts, still thinks he will greet me at the door everyday after work, waking up seeing him by my bed.... There will never be another Boby.

---

 

[Laura]

Some definately affect you more then others...i had a bottle baby kitten, he almost died, i saved him and kept him. He was my 'soul'. I cant explain the connection we had. It was very different then any of my other cats. I have lost many critters over the years. they all hurt, but this one.............. very different... I feel like I lost a child.
He was diagnosed with cancer. Squamous cell. On his tongue.. no treatment, I did what surgery i could... but you cant live without a tongue... I had a feeding tube installed when he started having trouble eating.. He lived for food... He would jump up on his table, and wait to be fed.. His spirit was great..
It was so hard to let go.. but one night, it was time... a friend of mine who worked for Vet came to the house and helped me say goodbye.. he went peacefully... in my arms...
I had a painting done, he is my angel... i miss him SO much. It will be two years this weekend... I have lost three others since then and nothing hurts like losing my Gizmo.....
So they are all different...

---

My Gizmo....

 

[wellington]

Sometimes telling your story to others who understands can also help the pain of losing our loved ones. People understand losing human loved ones. Most people don't understand the pain of losing our animal loved ones. I hope we all can feel at least a little bit better, posting our stories and knowing that most, if not all of us understand the loss we feel.
On another note along these lines. Don't ever feel quity for having to put your loved one down. You did not kill them, you saved them! You saved them from the pain they will endure to try to keep us happy. I only wish we could do the same for our human loved ones.
Grogansilver, Anthony, please know that you have helped many people in their grieving with your line of work. Please find peace in that fact. I hope most for you that you can find some peace for yourself and family in knowing that you not only helped many people through their own grieving, but that we understand or at least try to understand what you are going through yourself. Speak your mind any time here. I think I can speak for everyone or most of us, that we don't mind at all. I truly hope speaking here has helped you at least a little along with everyone else.
I wish happiness and better memories for you and everyone.:shy:

 

[Terry Allan Hall]

I've lost two pets that affected me way beyond the norm, as it were...the first was my Grandfather pet Hermann's tortoise, who I inherited at age 17, upon his passing. She'd been his pet ever since he'd tripped over her during WWII, and was his constant companion through the next 30-odd years, and then 19 more years w/ me.

That tortoise went through several apartments, girlfriends and shenanigens, and blessed my home with her presence.

One morning, she simply didn't wake up...took her to my vet, as I just couldn't accept that she was dead and hoped she was just in some kind of coma, but my vet assured me that she was, indeed, gone, and likely from old age, (Grandfather figured she was probably at least 20, and then had been part of our family for about 50 more).

It has been almost 20 years since she passed, but I still miss her a lot.

The other was Espeyotii (say it slowly ), a merle female Great Dane that was truly "my dog"...my former wife decided that she wanted a Dane, and having had a couple as a kid, I was OK with it, myself, so we found some puupies advertised in the 'paper and off we went.

Upon arrival, while my ex- was checking out some fawns pups (light brown, like Marmaduke, for those who don't know) while the husband had 3 grey and black ones in a box, carrying them over to a water-filled tub...I asked him about them and he answered "These are merles and I gotta drown them, 'cause they''re the wrong color!" I said, "Come again" and he explained that some colors (white, fawnequin, merle, merlequin, fawn mantle) are not "recognized" as acceptable and are often culled, so they can't share their "tainted genes" (his words) w/ Show-grade dogs.

I then asked why not sell them as pet-grade Danes, rather than kill them outright? He answered who'd give him even $50 a piece? I pulled out $150 from my wallet, put it into his shirt pocket, told him "Sold" and took the box from his hands.

He tried to grab the box back and said, "If my wife finds out that I sold them, she might kick my a---!", but I replied that if he tried to grab the box one more time, I assuredly would kick it for him...and besides, he can tell her he did "dispose" of the pups, with $150 in his wallet, and she needn't know 5the difference...he considered the wisdom of my argument, and I put the pups in the van, collected my wife, and listened to her bend my ear all the way home for not buying the puppy she wanted...

Gave one pup to my sister and one to the ex-'s cousin (one of my few in-laws I actually liked) and kept the best looking pup for us. About 3 months later, the ex- decided to get rid of Essie and I decided, no, Essie stays and that she was now MY dog...this involved that I take her with me everywhere I went, so the ex- couldn't take her to the pound (or worse), thus Essie and I bonded BIG-TIME.

My boss at that point, being a dog-lover himself, was cool about her coming to work everyday, either sleeping/hanging in my work area (cold or wet days) or sleeping on a cushion on the bed of my pickup (warm days)...soon I had her trained to fetch me tools, which further amused my boss (we had a runniong gag about how he'd fire my Hippy butt, but he'd miss the mutt, and I'd quit, but the mutt would miss him too much )

She eventually learned so many words and what they meant that she developed exceptional manners, and she had an invite to visit friends and family and amuse them with such tricks as "Essie, go get my jacket/hat/shoes/toolbox/book/", "Essie, go give (name) a big kiss" (children loved this one), and our bar-trick "Essie, may I have this dance" (at which point she'd get up on her hind legs, and put her front feet on my shoulders and we'd dance to whatever music was playing...this one got us a lot of free beer and sausage sandwiches - I got most of the beer and she got most of the sausage sandiches, of course ).

A few weeks before her 11th b'day, she was laying on the couch, w/ her head in my lap, when she whined, reached up to lick my face, as if to say "Goodbye", laid her head back down and stopped breathing. This was about 8 years ago.

Still miss her quite a bit, even though I love all our other dogs (and we have a herd!)...she was 1 in a 1000000.

 

[Sammy]

There is no getting over it completely... Sharing our memories will help ease the pain. Every time I read this thread my tears won't stop.

 

[Pokeymeg]

I really knew better than to read this at work....but I did it anyway...I hope no one looks into my cubicle anytime soon! Touching stories, every single one

 

[lynnedit]

Oh, my, such stories.
I miss our Zeke, a lab mix that we rescued from a sheep farmer before being put down. He was being trained as a sheep dog, and didn't have 'the look'.
That dog lived another 14 years, grew up with my kids. He was telepathic, he could tell our friend's kid was autistic and when at her house, he never left her side.
He was our buddy.
His picture is on our wall, what can I say?

 

[IRTehDuckie]

i lost my bearded dragon, Lillie while i was camping with her and my family =[ that was years ago, but even today i still shed a dew tears over it =[ you really never do get over it, and it never really gets easier.